


Hurt

by madsmeetsmisha



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: AU sort of, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awkward Boners, Hurt/Comfort, I don't give permission to show this fic on any other site or app than AO3 or wattpad, Jealousy, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Obvious Jaskier, POV Alternating, Pining, Please don't copy to another site, Rating May Change, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension, but I love him, but also a bit canon, confused Geralt, lambert is a pain in the ass, takes place after episode 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-28
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-02-24 16:08:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 34,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22000720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madsmeetsmisha/pseuds/madsmeetsmisha
Summary: After Geralt had finally managed to get rid of Jaskier once and for all, he could finally start his search for Ciri. Too bad he never expected to miss the bard so much. . .
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 479
Kudos: 1634
Collections: Good Relationship Etiquette (familial included) - or Good BDSM Etiquette - or Good Relationship and BDSM Etiquette





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [luckymunchkin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/luckymunchkin/gifts).



> First of all I would like to say that I actually love Yennefer, her interesting development in the story, as well as her relationship with Geralt. But I wanted to write something gay. ^^ That's why she can't have the Witcher in this little fic. Sorry (not really though ^^).  
> I hope you enjoy reading this. 
> 
> Many thanks to the lovely @thatwasamazing for the corrections. As English is not my mother tongue I am always super thankful for your help. I send you a thousand kisses!!   
> (I don't give permission to show this fic on any other site or app than AO3 or wattpad)
> 
> @luckymunchkin this fic is for you! Thanks for helping with the photo album. I hope you like this fic! Ich hab dich lieb! <3

Deep inside Jaskier knew that Geralt was just angry, but still, it hurt. It hurt more than he expected. Not that he hadn't already reckoned his presence would become too much for the Witcher. Jaskier knew that people found him annoying most of the time, because he talked too much and he turned everything that happened around him into songs. Why should Geralt of Rivia of all people be any different? 

Tears were rolling down the bard's cheeks unimpeded. Of course, it was kind of unmanly to cry like a baby. But he couldn't help it. The last weeks and months had been so incredibly exhausting. Not physically. No, their stony treck on foot over mountains and through valleys, through rivers and lakes, always remained the same. He was used to that. The exhaustion was emotional. 

Jaskier was used to Geralt always ending up in bed with beautiful women to let off some steam. He was doing the same when he had the chance. And he had ample opportunity to do so. But since the Witcher had met Yennefer of Vengerberg everything was different. All of a sudden it was no longer different women in the different villages who warmed the bed of the Witcher, but only the one. Suddenly it seemed like there were only two things left in the life of Geralt of Rivia - Yennefer the sorceress and the search for the child of surprise. The latter, however, was not to blame for Jaskier's heartache. 

The bard tried to hide his feelings for the other man as best he could. The problem wasn't that he had fallen in love with a man. Jaskier had affairs with a fair share of men and women. Why leave out half of humanity when you could have fun with both? But he knew there was no point in expecting the Witcher to return his feelings. Geralt did not share his love for the same gender, Jaskier was sure of that. At least the other man had never shown any interest in a man in all the time they were together.

Most of the time he even managed to convince himself that it didn't matter that Geralt fell more and more under the spell of the beautiful sorceress. But in the dark night, when he crawled under his sheets, he often could not hold back the tears. Especially when he was in the unfortunate situation of having to listen to the lovemaking of the couple. Jaskier hated such nights! He never was able to fall asleep afterwards even though the sounds had faded away and he heard Geralt's soft snoring.

Of course, he had also tried to drown his sorrow in alcohol and women or even men, but without success. The alcohol only made him more depressed and other people simply weren't able to satisfy his innermost longing any longer. It was hopeless. Maybe, in the end, it was not bad at all that Geralt had drawn a line and sent him away once and for all. Jaskier had often thought about leaving the Witcher to start over himself. But somehow he never had the heart to leave. Now he was forced to go,

But the memory of the Witcher's vitriolic words would be burned into Jaskier's brain forever. 

_“Damn it Jaskier! Why is it whenever I find myself in a pile of shit these days, it’s you shovelling it?”_ the other man had yelled at him. 

That wasn't fair, but Geralt didn't want to hear about it. He had already talked himself into a rage and went for the final blow. 

“ _The child of surprise the djinn, all of it. If life could give me one blessing, it would be to take you off my hands,”_ he had said. 

The worst thing was the cold look in his beautiful yellow eyes when he blamed Jaskier for everything. It hurt incredibly that the only favour Geralt hoped for was to get rid of him. Well, that wish had now come true. Even if he would never get Yennefer according to the golden dragon, Geralt could at least be happy about the absence of the singer from now on. 

Angrily, Jaskier wiped the tears from his eyes as he quickened his steps. He had always known that this day would come. Tears wouldn't make him feel better. 

***

  
  


The words of the golden dragon never left his mind. Whether he wanted it or not, they were burned into his mind like an ulcer. 

" _I am going to save you both a lot of hurt with a little pain now, The sorceress will never regain her womb. And though you never wanted to lose her, Geralt, you will_ ," the golden dragon had said. 

A little pain? What did the old man know? Everything hurt - everything! People always talked about how witchers had no feelings. Geralt desperately wished that the rumours were true.

" _What you are missing is still out there. Your legacy, your destiny. I know it. And you know it,_ " the dragon went on. 

But Geralt couldn't care less about his destiny at that moment. Even though he knew that the man was referring to the child of surprise, which was his fate, somehow Geralt had the feeling that there was more, that he missed something important. As if the old man wanted to draw his attention to something else. But right now he was still too angry to think about it. If it weren't for that annoying bard his life would be a lot easier. It was a good and right decision to finally tell him the truth. The young man should harass someone else to get his adventure stories. He would no longer be available in the future. He had borne the bard long enough.

Slowly Geralt turned around and saw how the singer went away with a lowered head without turning back. For a short moment Geralt had the feeling that he had to stop Jaskier and apologize. Annoyed, he shook his head. He should be glad that he finally got rid of the over-excited singer. The man had brought him nothing but trouble! Determined, Geralt also made his way back down to the valley, but in the opposite direction. As far away from the bard as possible. 

***

All Jaskier could do against the sadness in his heart was to sing about it. And he did. He sang of unrequited love and heartache. Some of his listeners were moved to tears, many even knew what he was singing about. Unrequited love was, unfortunately, a more widespread phenomenon than Jaskier had thought. He had now been on the road for two weeks without Geralt and in the meantime the weather had adapted to his mood. It was raining cats and dogs and it was bitterly cold. Jaskier was on his way to the next village. He had been wandering aimlessly lately. If he was honest, he had no idea what to do. He had felt safe in Geralt's presence and he had a job to do.

He wrote down the story of the Witcher and sang about his adventures. Now Jaskier had to be content with sometimes hearing about Geralt's adventures from others in some dodgy inns. It hurt and so he decided not to ask if anyone had heard from Geralt of Rivia. It was for the best. Surely Jaskier could find another job to do, something that didn't remind him of the Witcher. Sighing, he put up his collar to protect himself a little against the rain and the wind. But it didn't do much good. He was completely soaked anyway.

***

What surprised Geralt the most was the fact that it wasn't Yennefer he missed when his anger disappeared. It was Jaskier. The Witcher missed the cheerful voice he had already become so accustomed to, the smiling face of the bard, who didn't let himself be irritated by Geralt's grumpy growls. Why had he managed to scare the other man away this time? Didn't the bard usually endure all his whims? But with shame, Geralt remembered what he had said to his friend. He didn't mean it. Not one word! Even if Jaskier was often to blame for unfortunate events, it was still not true that Geralt really wanted to get rid of him. He wanted to get rid of him at that moment, yes, but not forever. Why hadn't the other man known? He used to see through Geralt. 

Fuck! Unhappily, the Witcher continued his way. He had already made it a habit, a few days after Jaskier had left him, to ask not only for the girl when he came to a new village but also for the bard. But so far nothing. It seemed like they both fell off the face of the earth. How would he ever apologize if he couldn't find his friend for fuck's sake?

***


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am overwhelmed by your feedback. Thank you so so much! This is so much fun! I have to admit that I don't know the books or the games, I've only seen the series. ( but I will definitely read the books) So please excuse me if the monsters actually work differently than in my fic. I've done as much research as I can, but still. . .

Jaskier was already shaking all over when he finally arrived at the inn. Inside it was pleasantly warm and fortunately dry. Gratefully he sat down at a table in a dark corner and ordered a beer and something to eat. He was starving!

Only some time after the food was served did he at least have the feeling of being able to move his ice-cold fingers again. His toes were still frozen but he knew that they also thawed slowly as they began to tingle. Geralt would have made sure that it wouldn't have come to that. He would have looked for shelter soon enough. Darn! Why did all his thoughts lead him to the damn Witcher? He had to stop this! It was unhealthy and stupid and pathetic...

Resigned, he ran his hand over his face and rubbed his burning eyes. He had better start eating before it got cold.

He devoured the first bites with great appetite, but much too quickly he had the feeling of being full. Only a few weeks ago he would have had no problem to eat the whole portion of the bœuf bourguignon, but now…

It was about time to stop all the pining. Jaskier forced himself to eat a few more bites of the delicious dish. But he didn't have a chance to empty the whole bowl. What a waste!

“Bard! Sing us a song!" one of the guests who recognized Jaskier yelled.

Oh come on! Couldn't he eat in peace for once? He hadn't crept into the darkest corner without a reason.

Sighing, he reached for his lute and began to sing. But after the third song about unrequited love and heartbreak, the innkeeper approached his table with a determined look on his face.

“Bard, by all that's right and fair, you need to stop depressing my guests. You're ruining my whole business. People want to laugh and be happy. Real life is hard enough, don’t you think? No one wants to hear songs about your broken heart!" he said.

Jaskier was sure that the bulky man would throw him out without further ado unless he sang something else. So he put the lute aside.

“Sing us something about the Witcher!" one of the guests cried and some of the others cheered.

“Yes! Sing us about the Witcher’s adventures!”

Jaskier closed his eyes for a brief moment and took a deep breath. It always ended that way. People wanted him to sing about the Witcher and he would never get over the man. But maybe if he gave them what they wanted he would at least get the food for free. A room for the night wouldn't be bad either.

So despite the iron claw clutching his chest, he began to sing “Toss a Coin to your Witcher” and the crowd seemed pleased with his choice.

***

Geralt had been on empty country roads for decades but he had never noticed how lonely travelling without a companion could feel.

However, when he met two men a few miles before Rouen he immediately wished to be alone again. They came running towards him as if they had already been waiting for him. Turns out they needed his help. How could it be otherwise? According to their descriptions, they had a serious problem with a Kikimore swarm. That wasn't surprising in this swampy area. The soil had to be perfect for the insectoid creatures. Geralt didn't understand why there were always problems between humans and Kikimore, because the animals always marked their territory with an edge that was cleaned from plants and adorned with skeletons.

"And what do you expect from me now, gentlemen?" Geralt asked after he heard the whole story.

"We would like you to smoke out the swarm and destroy the monsters," the larger of the two replied.

The other man nodded in agreement.

"You'll get a handsome reward for this,” he said.

Geralt almost laughed. He had already met a few Kikimore queens in his long life and knew that he had to consider it a victory that he was still alive. All he was able to do when he met the powerful creatures was to run. All the gold in the world wouldn't tempt him to enter the Kikimore territory. You would have to be a suicidal idiot to go there on purpose.

"No!" he therefore answered with his rough voice, and spurred his horse Roach to move on.

"Wait! Witcher please, you're our only hope! How else are we going to get rid of the beasts?" the taller man asked.

"You can't get rid of Kikimores. If you wanna survive you try to avoid them. They only can survive in the marsh. So you should just be careful where you go if you have to enter the swampland. Their territories are well marked. If you teach your children to pay attention to the right signs, you should have no problems," Geralt said in a patient tone as if he would talk to a child.

"But..." one of the men started again.

“We wanted to drain a piece of the marsh to built a safe trail to Broda. It would shorten the travelling time to go there by two days," the smaller man explained.

Geralt raised an eyebrow in surprise. They wanted him to risk his life for a shorter route to the next village? He could almost hear Jaskier sing a cynical song about this. What a shame that he wasn't here. Geralt sighed. Fuck! He needed to find the bard.

"I don't think so," he answered briefly.

That was all he had to say on the subject.

"You don't think so? But... think about all the gold... think about..."

Geralt did not listen to them anymore. He spurred his horse on even before the man could finish the sentence.

He certainly wouldn't mess with a whole nest of Kikimores. Without looking back, he rode on towards the village.

The rain was getting worse and he hoped that Jaskier had found shelter somewhere. The bard was unable to take care of himself. Damn it! He was sure the idiot didn't start looking for a dry hideout in time. For sure he was completely soaked by now.

When he entered the inn it suddenly became completely quiet in the room. Geralt was used to having such an effect on people. They needed his help, but they were also afraid of him. Fortunately, he had enough gold coins left to pay for hay for his horse, some food for himself, and a room for the night. He immediately set out to find the innkeeper and asked him about the girl. But as usual, nobody had seen her.

"Has a bard come here recently? He is a little smaller than me and wears noble clothes which are much too cold for this season and also dirty from wandering around. He also has a lute with him and often sings about the adventures of a Witcher. He is far too trustful and nice for his own good, he talks too much and is always in an annoyingly good mood," the Witcher tried to describe his friend.

The shocked expression on the chubby man's face showed the Witcher that Jaskier must have been in the inn. Geralt felt hope rise inside of him. Maybe the bard was even still here.

"Ahem... so... there was a bard here a few hours ago. But... but this one wasn't in a good mood. He would not stop singing sad songs about his broken heart, of unfulfilled love and the sufferings of jealousy and such nonsense. Even the songs about adventure and heroic deeds sounded destructively sad... I had to kick him out. People don't drink that much if you spoil their mood,." the man explained grumpily.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go. Enjoy! ^^

Jaskier knew he had to find some dry shelter soon. The time in the inn had not been enough to dry out completely and so he was very cold immediately. If only he had been able to pull himself together a little bit more he would still be sitting in the warm room of the inn now. He would only have had to ban the sadness from his voice.

Damn it!

Angry at his incompetence, he kicked a stone with his foot. He was such a fool! His pining would kill him in the end!

"Meow," he heard all at once.

“Oh shit!” he hissed. The stone must have hit a cat! Shit!

“Did I hurt you, kitty? I am so sorry.”

He was good for absolutely nothing at the moment. His eyes searched for the silhouette of the cat in the twilight.

The poor creature sat at the side of the road and looked at him accusingly. Quickly he went to it and crouched down in front of the little animal to stroke it, but also to see if he had hurt it. Fortunately, there seemed to be no bleeding. Purring, the cat leaned into his touch. 

"Poor little kitty. Did they throw you out in this filthy weather too?"Jaskier asked compassionately, although he knew that the animal wouldn't answer. 

He loved cats and usually cats loved him. Not if he was with Geralt, though. Cats seemed to hate the Witcher.

Amused, he remembere d when  he once had a cat in his arms near a  farm an d it snuggled up to him purring. But as soon as Geralt came closer the animal started hissing like crazy. Geralt claimed that the animals would absorb magic. However, the cat didn't seem to want the magic of the Witcher. On the contrary. It wanted him as far away as possible.

Sadness immediately fell upon him at the thought of the other man. Would this ever stop?

The cat looked at him, bending its head as if it would be able to understand him.

"Meow."

Jaskier had to laugh despite the melancholy thoughts. The cat was really cute as it sat in front of him, black except for one paw which was white, and with huge eyes and pupils that had already adjusted to the evening light. He had forgotten how much he always liked cats.

"As much as I'd like to spend time talking with you further, I have to find shelter somewhere before I catch pneumonia," he said, stroking the head of the animal once more and then turned away with a heavy heart.

But already after a few steps he noticed that the animal followed him. All the better, he thought. He didn't mind a little entertainment. And for the first time in weeks, he felt a little lighter in his heart. At least someone was there to listen to him, even though he couldn't expect an answer.

***

Geralt had difficulties to process what the innkeeper told him. Did he just say that Jaskier was here and he threw him out of the inn because…because his songs were too sad?

What the fuck?

And why the hell should the bard suddenly sing sad songs? Jaskier was the most cheerful soul Geralt knew!

But he could think about this later. First he had to know where Jaskier was. Geralt grabbed the man by the collar and pushed him against the wall.

"You kicked him out in the middle of the night in the rain even though you knew that there is a huge nest of Kikimores in the marsh, just because his songs were too sad? Fuck you! It would have been more compassionate to kill him right away," the Witcher hissed.

It cost him every ounce of self-control he had not to squeeze the man's throat and watch him suffocate.

"I...I..." the man stammered, frightened.

Geralt strengthened his grip and lifted the man into the air.

"I should lead the Kikimore soldiers here to this inn or kill you myself. To send an innocent man out on a night like this is cruel! You know I am a monster hunter. And you are one of the most horrible monsters I have seen in a long time because your motive wasn't defense or hunger, just greed!" Geralt growled and threw the innkeeper across the room without warning.

Fuck! Jaskier would certainly look for shelter in the rain. And knowing the bard as he did, the man would run straight into the marsh.

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

***

When he came to a fork in the road, Jaskier moaned. How could he decide on a path if he didn't even know where he wanted to go? Since it didn't really make a difference, he decided to leave the main road and use the other way. The cat still followed him.

"What do you say cat, shall we try our luck this way?"

The cat just looked at him. Its stoic expression almost reminded him of Geralt. But unlike his former friend, the animal went after him without grumbling.

When Jaskier had followed the path for a while, he noticed that it suddenly ended. It was as if all the workers had fled and left everything lying around without ever finishing. This was odd.

"Shall we still go on even is there is no path?" he asked the cat.

The kitten meowed and wrapped itself around his legs. Jaskier took this as a sign and wanted to go on, but the animal suddenly stood in front of him and hissed.

Whoa! What the hell?

"Hey kitty, what are you doing?" he asked, but the cat didn't calm down. Furious, it stood in front of him with its tail erect and its hump bent. 

Suddenly it struck him. Parts of skeletons lay neatly on the ground nearby.

Holy Mother of all fair virgins!

Not only did he almost walk into the marsh in the darkness, but he also almost walked into the middle of a nest of Kikimores!

How many times had Geralt warned him about the beasts?

Damn it! He owed his life to the cat!

***

Geralt just couldn't believe that Jaskier was walking around in the pouring rain somewhere. Not only because he was worried about the bard's health, but also because the other man was apparently so close and Geralt still had no idea where to look for him.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Where would Jaskier look for shelter? Most likely he was walking down the street. Geralt decided that it didn't make sense to look for him somewhere off the road. So instead he decided he would ride along the road until he came to the place where the road would part into the new path. The path that should lead into the marsh to the next village but wasn't finished yet because of the Kikimores, but was created because the older path to the village was much longer.

He would at least ride as far as the edge of the Kikimore territory. Geralt had to swallow hard. The idea that Jaskier could have gotten into the nest of the Kikimores made him freeze. He had worried about the bard often enough, but never before had he felt so helpless. What if he was too late? What if the only parts left of the bard were skeletal pieces that now flanked the outer borders of the Kikimore territory. The idea that his stupid emotional outburst might be to blame, that he might never see his friend again, that he may never have the chance to apologize and tell the other man how important he is to him, caused him nausea. 

He had been in many dangerous situations in his life and often he had faced death, but never before in his life had he been so scared.

***


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year!

Jaskier hardly dared to breathe as he slowly turned around and quickly but silently crept back the way he had come. 

Damn, that was close! 

The cat walked beside him and kept looking up at him, almost like it wanted to make sure he was still there. He couldn't see its face in the dark, but he had the feeling that the little animal was pleased with itself. And damn it had every right to be!

What a difference a little white mark on a paw could make. He knew from stories how much misfortune black cats could bring, but this cat brought not disaster, but pure luck. 

He should dedicate a song to the cute little creature. Yes, this was an excellent idea! 

As soon as he was somewhere dry and safe and had some rest he would write a song for his little hero. 

Anyway, it was high time that he finally wrote songs about adventures again and not just about his aching heart. People would love stories about the cat and maybe if the songs were good enough he wouldn't be thrown out of an inn in the pouring rain anymore.

Satisfied that he at least had a little plan for the future, he all but ran back to the main road. 

He was so relieved when he felt the solid gravel of the main road under his feet again that he took a deep breath. 

But then he looked at the road. What was he supposed to do now? Should he go back to the village and search for a shed, or take the long way to the next village? But it was the middle of the night and he was bitterly cold... 

"What the hell? Are you coming from the path that leads to Broda? And you are still alive? How the heck is this even possible?" a voice from the darkness suddenly asked him. 

Startled, he looked around. He hadn't seen the dark figures crouching by the side of the road. By the devil! He had enough nasty surprises for one day. 

"The road ends in the swamp and I wouldn't advise you to use it," Jaskier replied when he had recovered from the shock.

Only now did he realize that there were two men crouching next to a third man who lay on the ground. 

Oh, damn it! 

Robbers.

The man on the ground moaned. Surely they had knocked him down. 

Shit! Today was just not his day! 

Suddenly the cat jumped on his shoulder and started hissing at the robbers. 

His brave little hero tried to save him again. He would definitely write a ballade for the cat if the robbers didn't slit his throat first. 

But he would at least try his best to survive. If a cute little animal like the cat on his shoulder managed to be brave he would too, he thought, as he approached the robbers and their victim, much more fearlessly than he felt. 

One of them straightened up when Jaskier came closer. 

"Who are you?" the man wanted to know, and the bard was pleased and a bit surprised to discover that his voice was trembling. 

Was the man afraid of him? The robber had to realize that he was just a simple bard after all. Even in the darkness he had to see that a lute was hanging over Jaskier's shoulder. 

Anyway, the only chance Jaskier had at the moment was to tell lies.

"I am just someone who isn't afraid to walk across the swamp at night despite the monsters that live there. And who are you?" he asked with the boldest voice he was able to muster. 

The man backed away even further. Now the second man looked at him as well and let go of the victim. 

"Is...is that a black cat sitting on your shoulder?" he asked and his voice sounded almost panicked. 

They were really afraid of him. 

Oh he was so wrong! This was definitely his day!

***

When Geralt arrived at the fork in the road, he saw nothing unusual. But what did he expect? That Jaskier would be waiting for him there? Ridiculous!

Fuck! He needed something. Just a little sign that the bard was safe. 

But it was too dark to read tracks and the ground wasn't soft enough to leave shoe prints. Deep down he just knew that Jaskier had taken the turnoff. 

Of course he had! Jaskier had an extraordinary talent to manoeuvre himself into dangerous situations and this time Geralt hadn't been there to save him. Fuck! The knot that had already formed in his stomach when he had learned that Jaskier had to leave the inn became even bigger. 

With a deep sigh, he decided to look at the new path to Broda, at least until he reaches the edge of the nest. If the bard really went into the nest it would be too late. He could only pray that he wouldn't find anything there. The idea that he would see his lute lying on the ground or another object belonging to Jaskier... He shook his head vigorously. There was no point in thinking about the worst case scenario now.

A few feet before the end of the path Geralt discovered skeletons on the ground. He got off his horse and searched for footprints in the darkness. He could not see enough, but he could feel the imprints in the muddy ground with his fingers. It looked like someone walked this way recently. A man and... a cat? Only a few inches before the path ended, the footprints stopped and led back again. No fresh footprints were leading into the nest as far as he could feel. 

Geralt was so relieved that he had to close his eyes for a short moment. Whoever had walked along here had turned back in time! 

So most likely the bard was fine. At least he was safe from the Kikimores. Now Geralt could only hope that the other man had found a warm shelter, or maybe he could catch up with him on the main road. With the horse he was much faster than the bard was on foot. 

Not even the fact that Jaskier might be travelling with a cat could dampen his hopeful mood. 

***

"Oh yes. I am travelling with a cat!" Jaskier said.

These idiots certainly couldn't see the cat’s white paw in the darkness. All the better, Jaskier thought. If they thought he was travelling with a black cat they might be afraid and leave him alone. Words, or better yet, lies were his only defence at the moment. He wasn't able to fight like Geralt, nor was he able to use magic like Yennefer. He was a simple bard with a proper voice, no more and no less. But he knew how to tell stories. That was, in fact, his only gift. And he would use it!

Maybe it would be enough to get him out of this situation.

"May I introduce you, gentlemen. This is Scary, my travelling companion," Jaskier continued. 

He made up the name of the cat spontaneously. But it fit. If people didn't know that the cat had a white paw, they would really be scared. 

"Meow." 

It was as if his little hero would play along.

"But... but this is a black cat. Aren't you afraid it'll bring you bad luck?" one of the men asked in wonder. 

Jaskier laughed. 

"No! Scary has brought me nothing but good luck so far," he answered truthfully. The cat had really brought him nothing but good fortune. “But I think it's bad luck for everyone else. Especially when you touch it. One man died immediately as a brick fell on his head after he touched Scary's head. Not very pleasant to look at, but it was his own fault. I warned him," Jaskier continued to lie and took another step towards the men. 

"Is your friend not well?" Jaskier asked innocently and pointed to the man lying on the ground. 

The two men had now retreated further. It almost seemed as if they had to pull themselves together not to run away. But Jaskier had a feeling that they were afraid to turn their backs on him. He almost laughed out loud. This was exactly the behaviour that Geralt often triggered in opponents. He never thought anyone could ever be just as afraid of him. Now he knew why the Witcher always tried to look so grumpy. It was fun if the bad guys were afraid of you. It was delightful to watch the two men slowly withdraw further and further without daring to turn their backs on him.

The two robbers were certainly armed and Jaskier would bet his lute that this was not their first robbery. And yet they were so afraid of him that they moved further and further away as unobtrusively as possible. 

Jaskier recognised a gold pouch in the hand of one robber. 

"Oh, gentlemen. I think you might have something that belongs to your friend on the ground, haven't you? I am sure you want to give it back to the man," he said and hoped that he wasn't pushing his luck but Scary helped him. 

"Meow," the little creature agreed.

It was almost comical how fast the robber dropped the pouch. 

Then they started to run and Jaskier couldn't suppress a muffled giggle. Still laughing, he held out a hand to the man on the ground to help him up. 

"I don't know who you are, but this cat is Moori. Her old owner died a few weeks ago. She's been wandering around here ever since. But I'm more than grateful for your gift of telling bold lies without batting an eye. It would have been hard to get my family through the winter without this gold. I owe you both," the man said as he struggled to stand up even with Jaskier's help. 

"It looks like Moori adopted you. Congratulations! Usually she is a scratching and biting beast. I've never seen her so calm. Not even her old owner could tame this cat. It’s a girl by the way. A very grumpy girl. But she seems to like you. For whatever reason. You make a good couple." the man continued and tried to get away the mud from his pants.

Jaskier stroked the cat who was still sitting on his shoulder, and she immediately started purring. Yeah, he couldn't agree more. They were definitely a very good couple! He could only hope that Scary was willing to follow him. 

“I have more than enough experience with grumpy individuals. That shouldn’t be a problem,” Jaskier answered and the man laughed. 

"Well, the paths of fate are often unfathomable. You should paint her white paw black, bard. Then you can continue to scare away the bad guys. You look like someone who could use a little protection," the man said in a friendly tone. 

He was certainly right about that. Without Geralt, Jaskier was quite defenceless. But somehow he would manage it without his former friend.

"Come with me, you two. You can sleep at my house and dry your clothes. I also have an old woollen coat I don't need any more. It may not be as beautiful as it once was, but it will keep you warm and protect you from the rain. The days are getting colder and your clothes are certainly not warm enough for the weather here in winter. Come now, for sure my wife is already worried, and besides she surely has some food on the stove."

Jaskier nodded in relief. Even though his heart was still heavy, he had a new travelling companion and this night he would sleep in a warm bed. At least that was something.

***

  
  



	5. Chapter 5

Jaskier couldn't believe his luck when he finally laid in a warm bed. How long had it been since he felt a real mattress under him? It must have been months! His feet finally warm and a fluffy blanket spread over him, he snuggled himself even deeper into the bed. On the other side of the room the fire in the small fireplace crackled, and right next to it his soaking wet clothes were hung on a clothesline to dry faster. Jaskier knew that the man and his wife had left the master bedroom to him. He assumed that it was the most beautiful and most comfortable room in the house. 

He would have been satisfied with much less, but he would certainly not complain. If the man wanted to show his gratitude in this way, he would enjoy every second. No one knew when he would have the chance to spend such a cosy night again. The best part was that Scary snuggled up to him. She was purring and everything was so cosy that he fell asleep within a very short time and for the first time in ages he didn't dream of the moment when Geralt had thrown away their friendship as if it was worth less than the dirt the pigs wallowed in. It was the most restful sleep he had in a long time and when Jaskier woke up in the morning, he knew that this was certainly due to the warm comfortable bed on the one hand, but also to the little fluffy body that was still cuddled up against him. 

Outside it was still raining and Jaskier closed his eyes once more to enjoy the moment a little longer. After some time there was a timid knock at the door and a little boy snuck inside the room. He couldn't have been more than six or seven. His hair was almost as light as Geralt's, but the boy had red chubby cheeks and his eyes were not yellow.

When he opened his mouth, Jaskier saw that the boy was missing his front teeth. The boy looked hilarious but in a cute way and for a brief moment he wondered if Geralt ever lost his front teeth  or if he ever looked so young. . Of course he knew that everyone had been a child once, but it was hard for him to imagine Geralt as anything other than the warrior he was now. 

"Mom says I should ask you if you want breakfast, you and the cat," the boy said shyly.

"What do you say, Scary, are we hungry?" Jaskier asked the cat. 

"Meow," was the obvious answer and the little boy giggled. 

"I think you can tell your mom that Scary is hungry. And so am I," Jaskier said and the child sent him a full mouth grin showing his lack of teeth before he left the room. 

When he was alone again, Jaskier yawned and stretched once more before he could will himself to leave the comfortable bed. Rested and in a remarkably good mood, he checked if his clothes were dry and found that the warmth of the fire had worked wonders. 

The clothes were not only dry but also still warm! 

What a luxury! 

When Jaskier left the room together with Scary, endless pairs of eyes were directed at them. 

Oh! What the hell? 

Now Jaskier knew what the man had meant by saying that he would never have been able to get his family through the winter without the gold. 

The man had...ten children! 

They sat around the long table and looked at him expectantly. It was a funny picture of how they all sat there with their flaxen-blond hair and red cheeks. They all had a bowl of porridge in front of them. Their father had apparently already disappeared for work. 

No wonder! It had to be long after sunrise. Jaskier had been asleep for ages.

Their mother stood by the stove, filling another bowl with the warm porridge. For Scary she had already put a bowl of milk on the floor. 

"I hope you had a good night's rest," she said and indicated him to sit down. 

"Oh, yes. The bed was wonderfully soft. Thank you. But you didn't have to give me the master bedroom. I could have slept in a barn. I would have been already grateful that it was dry."

She gave him a warm smile. 

"You not only saved my husband from the robbers yesterday, but also you saved my children and me. I think it's the least we can do to make sure you sleep in our best bed for at least one night. I haven't met many bards yet, but I have never heard that bards are so brave. My husband told me that the robbers were armed and extremely violent. You could have just vanished into the dark. But you didn't, and for that, I am very grateful." 

With a kind smile, she handed him the bowl of porridge and gave him a cup of steaming hot coffee. He gratefully accepted both and sat down at the table with the children who looked at him curiously. 

"Can you sing us a song, bard?" one of the older girls asked him. 

"Children, let the man eat his breakfast first!" the woman ordered. "But if you don't mind I would love to hear some of your songs as well. We don't have the chance to listen to music often," she said.

Jaskier smiled. Since yesterday a new song about his new cat friend was haunting his mind. He would love to sing it to the children and their mother.

  
  


***

Geralt drove Roach to run a little faster. Now that he suspected that the bard must be on this road to Broda, he grew impatient. 

He rode far into the night, but nothing! The country road was deserted. The rain whipped in his face but Geralt didn't even feel it. He was too focused on searching the darkness in front of him for the outline of a figure. Just as he was about to give up and slowed down Roach's pace, he saw them. Two hasty shadows! When they heard him they started to run, but Geralt caught up with them quickly and forced them to stop. 

"Stop! I'm not gonna hurt you. I just want to ask you a question," he convinced the two men. 

They still seemed restless, but they stopped. 

"I am looking for a bard. Have you seen him?" Geralt wanted to know. 

One of the men gasped and Geralt had the feeling that the two wanted to flee, but surely they knew that they had no chance against his horse.

"Answer me!" he commanded. 

"You...you mean the bard with the black cat? The one who went across the marsh without fearing the beasts there? Yes, we saw him and I wish we had never met him and his stupid cat! If you know what's good for you Witcher, stay away. Don't mess with him, he is dangerous!" the smaller of the two men answered and Geralt almost laughed out loud. 

What the fuck was the man talking about? No one could be seriously afraid of Jaskier! Maybe it wasn't his bard after all. 

"Where is he?" Geralt was impatient to know. 

"We last saw him near the village we came from. And if all the luck hasn't left us because of that fucking black cat, he hasn't followed us," the man said.

Damn it! It would be typical for the bard to travel with a dangerous creature like a black cat. Fuck! Didn't this idiot know how much bad luck it would bring him? This bard would be the end of him someday! Without paying any further attention to the men, Geralt hurried back to the village he just came from. 

***

"My husband wanted me to give you this. It's hair dye. It consists of plants and very strong black tea. I've never tried it on cat fur, but it should work. I sometimes dye the hair of the older ladies from the village who don't want to accept the fact that the ravages of time are also gnawing at them. Anyway, the hair doesn't really get black but does get very dark brown. So no one should notice that Moori...or Scary isn't really a black cat. You have to repeat the procedure every six weeks. I know that's annoying so maybe you could also ask a witch to use magic to get the white paw black, but I'm not sure if that wouldn't turn Scary into a real black cat, with all the negative side effects, if you know what I mean. So it's safer to simply dye her hair," she explained and yes, Jaskier thought that it made sense. 

And he didn't want to bewitch Scary. 

"You can do it in the barn after breakfast. It doesn't matter if the floor gets dirty there. Take the water pitcher with you and you shouldn't let the mixture get on your hands. Best use leaves to rub it in," she advised him. 

***

The morning sun was already flashing through the thick cloud cover when Geralt arrived back in the village. If Jaskier hadn't gone in the opposite direction, he must still be somewhere here in the village. Otherwise Geralt would have encountered the bard. Geralt suspected that Jaskier had found shelter somewhere. Maybe in some stable or shed. 

Surely he was still completely soaked. The ridiculous clothes the bard always wore may have been appropriate at court, but not when wandering the country. 

Tired, Geralt ran a hand over his face. Although the village was not very big, he didn't know how to find the bard. The best thing would be if he would just wait here at the end of the village. He didn't know whether he should wish the bard the men referred to was Jaskier at all. Because on the one hand he would be really desperate if it wasn't his friend, but on the other hand he would be happy if it wasn't Jaskier who was travelling with a black cat. 

Fuck! Even Geralt didn't know how to fight bad luck!

***

When Jaskier was finished with the procedure he looked at his work. Satisfied he noticed that no one would recognize that the paw was dark brown and not black. 

But now he knew why the woman wanted him to do the dyeing in the barn. He made an outrageous mess and Scary was not exactly helping. Of course she didn’t want to keep still during the procedure. 

On the contrary! She caught two mice in the meantime! 

But somehow he managed to colour her paw and to clean up the mess afterwards. And he even managed not to get his fingers black. Jaskier regarded this as a great success. 

After lunch the wife gave him the wool coat her husband had talked about the evening before and then he set off with his cat and his bags full of provisions for the next few days until he would arrive in Broda. 

He was wrapped in the new coat, which wasn't very pretty, but it kept him remarkably warm. Ready to face a new day at the road, he set off. With Scary at his side and the warm coat he was in a good mood until he reached the end of the village and saw him - Geralt of Rivia on horseback in the middle of the road in the pouring rain.

***


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your lovely comments. They are so much inspiration for me!!

Just when Geralt thought that Jaskier probably took another way, he saw a figure on the otherwise deserted country road. At first Geralt almost didn't recognize the bard because he was wrapped in a grey coat. A rough woollen coat was not a typical garment for the bard, who most of the times wore only fabrics that would also have gained recognition at court. But Geralt recognized the other man by his lively walk. And then he saw the black cat just running beside Jaskier. The damn fool had really gotten involved with a black cat. 

Fucking hell! Geralt knew that the bard was insane, but he didn't think that he was this insane. Slowly he descended from Roach and waited until Jaskier came closer. He thought about whether he should kill the black beast immediately with his sword, or whether it was better to just scare the cat away. Just before the bard reached Geralt, he stopped and stared at him. Geralt wasn't able to read the expression on the other man's face. 

Was it surprise or expectation or joy that flashed in his eyes? Geralt could only hope that Jaskier was happy to see him. He wasn't sure if the bard would ever forgive him. All he could do was to hope. But first they had to get rid of the black cat! 

“What the fuck are you thinking Bard? Even you can't be stupid enough to get involved with a black cat for fuck's sake!” Geralt grunted.

Jaskier's eyes went from surprised to shocked to hurt. 

“By the Gods Geralt! Sometimes I really hate you!“ Jaskier yelled.

“Keep the Gods out of this Jaskier, this was your stupid doing alone. No one forced you to befriend with a fucking black cat! I should kill the beast at once before it brings bad luck to me too!" he growled.

As if the black creature understood Geralt's intention, it jumped into Jaskier's arms and pressed itself tightly against him. 

“Meow,” echoed reproachfully from the mouth of the beast, but Geralt wasn't fooled easily. 

This animal brought bad luck. Not that Geralt actually believed in things like luck or misfortune, but black cats were monsters like Kikimore. They were beasts and even though they were more pleasing to look at, they were just as deadly. Geralt had no idea how their magic worked, but he knew that it was reality. 

“Did you come all the way here to insult me again?” Jaskier spat out and looked at Geralt with a furious expression. 

“No! Of course not!” Geralt replied. 

Why the hell was Jaskier angry at him now? Didn’t the other man see that he was just worried? 

***

“I came here to apologize, and to take care of you… I was worried for fuck's sake. And it turns out there's unfortunately enough to worry about. You really have an unhealthy knack for getting yourself into trouble, don't you?” Geralt said. 

What the...? Oh if Jaskier was physically stronger he would hit this arrogant asshole in front of him in the face! 

“What the fuck are you talking about Geralt?”

“You were on the edge of the Kikimore nest. With a black cat, mind you!" the Witcher replied and crossed his arms in front of his chest. 

Fuck! Even now Geralt looked so hot, Jaskier couldn't believe it. This wasn't fair! If he was honest, he had dreamed for more than one night about Geralt searching for him and apologizing. Even if he had never dared to dream of them being more than just friends, in his dreams Geralt had at least tried to be nice and to make up for his offensive words. But of course the real Geralt would be the same bad-tempered asshole as always. 

To hell with Geralt of Rivia! 

“You stupid, arrogant asshole! If you dare to hurt my little friend, I swear to the Gods…" Jaskier yelled. 

Geralt was taken aback by Jaskier’s outburst.

“You can't be surprised that I'm worried because you're with a monster,” Geralt said to defend himself.

“As you can see I am still alive. This is not really a black cat. Do you think I'm that stupid? Scary is a normal cat. I just coloured her white paw! Scary is not a monster! She is my friend now. ” Jaskier explained.

Why was he even surprised? Geralt had mentioned often enough how little he thought of Jaskier. Of course he would consider him dumb enough to walk around with a real black cat as if he wanted to collect all the misfortune in the world. 

"I know you think I can't survive without you, but as you can see, that's not true. Scary saved me from the Kikimore nest. She is my little hero! And the mere fact that the robbers believed my lies and Scary drove them away proves that I am capable of looking after myself. So you see, I don't need you!" Jaskier yelled and came closer. 

Geralt looked startled but Jaskier was so angry. Of course it was a lie, he needed Geralt, but not simply as a protector or a muse to inspire his songs. He needed Geralt for more than that. But there would never be more!

And Jaskier was so tired of this! 

He hated that Geralt thought so little of him that he probably didn't even see him as a real friend. Not to mention the fact that the bard's heart contracted painfully at the thought that Geralt would never want to be with him the way Jaskier wanted to be with the other man. 

Damn it! The day had started so well. 

But Jaskier had to make a decision. A decision that would hurt terribly! He couldn't spend his whole life pining for the other man. Even though Geralt might have lost Yennefer, there would be other witches or human women. And Jaskier just couldn't take it anymore. He no longer had the strength to watch or to listen. 

Geralt took a step towards him and Scary hissed at him with fury.

“Jaskier I'm sorry. I didn't mean the things I said to you. I was angry and I took it out on you. Please forgive me. I want things to go back to the way they were. I want to travel with you again. I miss you. I miss your clumsiness and your singing. I... I even miss saving you all the time when you manage to get into trouble. Even… even if I have to travel with a cat because it … because  _ she  _ is your friend now. Please!" 

It was tempting to give in, to just go back to how they were before Geralt sent him away. The other man was even willing to accept Scary! But Jaskier knew it wasn’t enough. He took a deep breath to prepare himself for what he had to do. 

“I'm sorry, but I can't," he whispered and looked to the ground. 

“Jaskier, please I…”

“Geralt listen," the bard said. There was no point in lying anymore. After this conversation, they would most likely never see each other again. “Of course I forgive you. I always knew you were just angry. And even though I am well aware that I can be annoying, I knew that you were only hurt because you lost Yennefer. But despite all this, I can't travel with you anymore.”

Gerald pinched his eyebrows together and looked at him as if he was looking for an answer in his face. 

“I don't understand…” the Witcher said. 

“I know,” Jaskier sighed. “How could you possibly understand?”

Scary snuggled up close to him as if she wanted to support him and it felt good to know that even though she was only an animal, someone would be with him after this painful confession. 

“I love you. Or better, I am in love with you Geralt. I have been in love with you for some time now and it was hell watching you fall more and more for Yennefer, knowing that there would never be hope…” Jaskier whispered. 

Tears were pricking in his eyes but he managed to hold them back. It hurt so much to say it out loud. But it had to be done. He had to end this and move on. 

  
  



	7. Chapter 7

"Jaskier..." Geralt gasped and started to take a step closer to the bard but the cat in Jaskier's arms nearly went crazy when she realized what he was up to.

Fuck! How was it possible that he hadn't realized how the other man felt about him? And what the fuck was he supposed to do now? Damn it! It was no problem for him to fight against uncontrollable opponents like monsters with three heads, or spider creatures, or even mutants. He could go for days without food or march in seething heat, but what the hell was he supposed to response to Jaskier's confession? He just had no idea what to say.

And the thought that he was causing the other man pain nearly killed him.

Fuck! Yennefer's mere presence must have hurt the bard like hell. But how could he have known? Jaskier had more than one affair during the time they had traveled together. Admittedly, Geralt knew that Jaskier enjoyed himself equally with men and women and Geralt was okay with that. Even if he never tried being with a man himself he could see the appeal. But having sex and being in love with someone were two very different things in Geralt's opinion. How the fucking hell did the bard even manage to fall in love with him?    
This was the mother of all nightmares!

No that wasn't fair. Of course it wasn't a nightmare, Geralt knew he should feel flattered instead of freaking out. He just never expected anything like this. Even now it was still hard for him to believe that the bard meant what he said. Especially because Geralt was certainly no one you could fall in love with so easily. On the contrary! He was broody and most of the time he was grumpy as hell.  He didn't talk enough, but when he did he was prone to swearing too much , and he always kept people at a distance. Of course he was aware that many of the women or witches found him attractive, but that was just sex, not even Yennefer wanted more.

At least not in the end. Not that it mattered now.

When Geralt thought about it now, he remembered that Jaskier often got himself into trouble because of his sex escapades at the beginning of their companionship, but then the affairs had stopped.

Fuck! Geralt had never questioned why they had stopped!

He hadn't even really noticed. Unwittingly he took another step towards the bard. The cat hissed at him again. The little beast was very protective towards the bard.

"Please, don't," Jaskier said and raised his hand defensively.

”Please, I don't want your pity, Geralt. I couldn't bear it."

"Jaskier, I had no idea that you..." Geralt muttered. Fuck! Why was this so hard? "Damn it, Jaskier, I'm no good at this. I don't know what to say. I'm sure you don't want to hear me say I'm sorry." Desperately he looked at the bard.

"No, you're right. I don't want to hear that you are sorry. Especially since it's not your fault," Jaskier said with a sad look on his face. Then he sighed. "Listen Geralt, I really wish you all the best. May the gods be with you. Even if you don't believe in them."

With that, the bard turned around and walked away quickly. It broke Geralt's heart to see him leave like that, but he was paralyzed at first.

Damn it! A few moments ago he was so happy to have his friend back. And now? He couldn't just let him leave now. Even though that may have been selfish, he needed the other man in his life. Geralt realized that until this moment he had never admitted to Jaskeir or himself that the bard was his friend, or better, that he was his best friend. Damn, when did this happen? When had Jaskier become one of the most important people in his life?

"Jaskier, please wait!" he yelled and followed the other man.

***

When Jaskier went away from Geralt with determined steps, he wasn't able to hold back the tears any longer.    
Unstoppable, they trickled over his cheeks and mixed with the raindrops that drenched his face. Jaskier didn't respond to Geralt's request. He just kept walking. He couldn't stop. He had to get away from Geralt. But already after a few feet he felt a hand on his shoulder. Annoyed, he wanted to shake it off but he just didn't have the energy.

"Jaskier, please. You're the only friend I have. Please come with me and help me search for the girl. There will be nothing for you to watch or listen to, I swear." 

Whoa! He didn't expect that. The words were so surprising that Jaskier almost tripped. Geralt regarded him as a friend and he wanted Jaskier to stay with him? 

Wow, Jaskier had never thought that Geralt would ever call him a friend. And it was almost ironic that these words which he always wanted to hear now hurt him even more. 

Slowly he turned around and looked at Geralt. To his surprise, he didn't see pity in the other man's eyes, but pain and sorrow. And all of a sudden it was Jaskier who felt sorry. He felt sorry for Geralt who had probably never known anything like family or friendship.

Being a Witcher for sure was hard and very lonely. And Geralt was not someone who made friends easily. Wouldn't it be selfish to leave Geralt alone now? Maybe he should wait until they had found the girl and Geralt wouldn't be alone anymore? Wasn't love selfless? At least in poetry it was often described that way.

Even though his heart was still heavy, he couldn't just abandon the other man now. Maybe he could learn to see Geralt as a friend and nothing more.

Slowly Jaskier turned around. He knew that Geralt would notice that his face was not only wet from the rain, but Jaskier didn't care. What did he have to lose? His friend knew about his feelings. 

"Okay. I know it's hard to be on the road without my beautiful singing. And lets be honest, who else should report on your heroic deeds Witcher?" Jaskier replied in an attempt to lighten the mood.

***

Geralt was so very relieved that he almost hugged Jaskier. He didn't even want to think about how it would have felt if he had let the bard leave. Slowly he got on his horse and rode next to Jaskier who stomped from one puddle into the next. Geralt doubted that the bard's shoes were waterproof. Even the best leather was soaked at some point.

All of a sudden Geralt thought that it was wrong to ride a horse while his friend had to walk beside him. Thoughtfully he pulled the reins to bring the Roach to a halt. Jaskier looked at him questioningly. He still carried the cat in his arms. Geralt was sure that Jaskier carried her to protect her from the wet ground. The bard did a much better job to care for the cat than Geralt did for Jaskier.

"Is something wrong?" the bard wanted to know.

"No, not really. It's just..." Geralt cleared his throat. He was embarrassed that he had never offered Jaskier to ride on Roach with him. 

”Doyouwannarideonthehorsewithme?" he mumbled. 

"What? Geralt I didn't understand one word," Jaskier said and sent him an amused smile.

Damn it! Geralt hadn't realized how much he had missed that smile! He took another deep breath and repeated his question. This time he tried not to mumble. 

”Do you want to ride on the horse with me?“

Jaskiers eyes went wide.

”What?“ he asked in a squeaking voice.

”Do you…“

"No, no, I got your question this time, but... You'd let me ride on Roach with you?"

Still in disbelief, Jaskier stared at him.

"Hmm," was all that came out of Geralt's mouth.

"And what about Scary?" Jaskier wanted to know.

"What about her?"Geralt asked.

"I'm not letting my cat walk in this filth. She'll drown in one of those puddles!"

Jaskier looked at him defiantly. Oh that damn cat! Of course the stupid animal couldn't just walk beside them. Geralt sighed and reached out his hands to the other man to take the beast from him. The bard's expression was almost shocked.    
But how did Jaskier imagine he would be able to climb up the horse? He would need both hands. So Geralt had no choice but to hold the little monster for a few moments. He had done worse! The cat hissed and scratched, but Geralt held on to it unperturbed until Jaskier was safely sitting in the saddle and took it in his arms again. 

It was a bit irritating that it felt so right to have Jaskier close but Geralt assumed that this was how people felt when they did something nice to people they cared for.

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For all of you who hoped that this was the last chapter and Geralt would just confess his feelings too, I am really sorry. I couldn't let this story end this way. Thank you @thatwasamazing. I am really glad you are still with me.


	8. Chapter 8

The rain eventually stopped on the third day they were on the road together. Jaskier was wet despite the new wool coat. But thanks to the fact that he was able to sit on the horse with Scary and Geralt close to him, at least he wasn't cold. And thank God they had a fireplace in their room at the inn in Breda. Jaskier knew that this was pure luxury. The only drop of bitterness when they slept in inns was that he had to hide Scary because the landlords did not want to let the black cat into their houses. It was crazy that people really were afraid of the small black furball! But otherwise the atmosphere was good. 

In fact, Jaskier was surprised by how normal the mood between him and Geralt was after his love confession. The other man didn't mention the conversation with one single word, but he behaved differently. He was… kind of softer. That meant less growling and more whole sentences, and once or twice Jaskier even heard Geralt use words like please or thank you. And there were no complaints about his singing! 

He had to admit it was nice for a change. And the most incredible thing was that he was allowed to ride Roach! He never thought he would live to see that day! Not to mention that Geralt would even let a cat get close to his beloved horse. Jaskier was almost certain that the Witcher trusted sirens more than cats. But for Scary, Geralt made an exception.

It was clear that Geralt and Scary still didn't like each other very much, but Jaskier almost had the impression that they had made some kind of truce for him and he was grateful for that.

When they continued their journey and the roads were almost dry again, the bard expected Geralt to insist that he and Scary should walk again, but the Witcher didn't. As if it was the most natural thing in the world, the other man held the cat firmly in his hands each time and waited patiently until Jaskier had climbed into the saddle. It was astonishing how quickly Geralt got used to the presence of the cat, but of course it was awesome. It would have been almost impossible for Jaskier to decide between the two. He loved them both!

When they had been on the road for about a week they reached Torester, a small town at the lower edge of the Blue Mountains. Jaskier hadn't been in this city for ages and he wondered how dirty the streets had become and how unpleasant the smell of the sewer was hanging in the air. But they wouldn't stay in the area for very long anyway. Geralt wanted to ride northward in his search for the girl.

The Witcher also seemed to know the town, as he steered Roach unerringly through the alleys to an inn.

"We'll spend the night here," he said as they reached their destination and he got off Roach.

”You'd better hide the cat back in your pocket. People are afraid of her and I'm sure that even this landlord won't give us a room if he sees we're travelling with a black cat."

Jaskier nodded in agreement and let Scary gently disappear into the bag. He had to admit he hadn't expected that Scary could make it difficult for him to stay in an inn at first. But now he knew how to hide his little friend. Lovingly he stroked her head once more as if he wanted to make her understand that she had to be quiet, at least until they were in their room. Scary gazed up at him with her huge eyes, looking innocent and so cute.

"Meow," she replied as if to reassure him that she would be a good girl.

When they entered the inn, Jaskier took a deep breath of relief. It smelled of alcohol, food and smoke in the large dark room, but that was much more pleasant than the foul smell of the city.

***

"Oh be welcome, gentleman. I feel honoured to accommodate two Witchers at once," the landlord greeted them immediately. Two Witchers? Curious, Geralt looked around in the dimly lit room and noticed the young man, who stood up from his place and came towards them.

Lambert! He hadn't seen the other man in ages!

"Geralt of Rivia! What a nice and unnecessary surprise!" yelled Lambert in his usual sarcastic manner.

"I guess the mayor of this city didn't think one Witcher was enough for his problem. Probably thought I wouldn't be able to do it alone. Nowadays it seems that for all heroic achievements one would need Geralt of Rivia," Lambert murmured and Geralt had to admit that he was confused.

Lambert's tone was friendly, but there was no doubt that he was not at all pleased to meet Geralt here.

Huh? But why?

Geralt knew that the other man had a biting tongue, but now he sounded almost hostile. Maybe Lambert was afraid that he would have to share the gold with Geralt?

"Lambert! This is really a surprise! And don't be alarmed, I'm not here to help the mayor. We're just passing through. This is my travelling companion..." Geralt said and turned to Jaskier.

"I know who that is. The whole country knows that Geralt of Rivia has his own bard to sing about his heroic deeds," Lambert interrupted Geralt impatiently. ”Of course I am aware that this is Julian Alfred Pankratz, Viscount de Lettenhove, better known as Jaskier the Bard," Lambert said in a theatrical voice.

Okay! This behaviour was more than strange. What was wrong with that other Witcher? Geralt almost had the impression that Lambert was jealous. But why? Because of the bard?

"Did you know that Jaskier is a foreign word for buttercup? So your pretty companion is a little yellow flower. It's cute, isn't it? I'm still impressed that you could even find a man from court to sing of your adventures," Lambert said, turning his yellow eyes towards Jaskier and continuing his speech. ”If our grumpy friend becomes too much for you, you are welcome to travel with me, bard. I could use some musical advertisement. I can promise you that my adventures are at least as impressive, but unfortunately I have no handsome nobleman to sing about them," Lambert said and winked at the bard.

Geralt gasped for air in surprise. What the fuck? Handsome nobleman? Was Lambert flirting with his bar... with Jaskier? The thought that Jaskier could simply replace him with another Witcher frightened Geralt more than he cared to admit.

Lambert laughed, clearly sensing his anger.

"As much as I'd love to chat more with you, I have to go. I have to kill Zeugl."

Zeugl? Alone? This was a very bad idea.

"What? Lambert, you're crazy! As filthy as this town is, the Zeugl must be grown. You know these beasts can reproduce without a partner. So you have to expect that it is not alone, and as far as the pollution has progressed I think that the brood is also already full grown. You can never do that alone," Geralt said worriedly.

"So what do you suggest? That I take you with me and share gold and glory? Thanks but no thanks. I think I will manage alone, Geralt. See you soon. And Jaskier... think about my offer."

With that, Lambert left the inn. What an idiot! Geralt actually didn't think he was someone who shied away from a fight, but it was just stupid to try to exterminate a whole family of Zeugl alone.

***

"Would you like something to eat?" the innkeeper asked when Lambert had left. Geralt immediately sat down at one of the tables but Jaskier wanted to go to the room first to free Scary from the bag. After he cuddled with the little cat and tried to explain to her that she wasn't supposed to leave the room, Jaskier went downstairs to join Geralt who was talking to a beautiful young woman. Her curly blonde locks reached all the way down to her voluptuous bottom and Jaskier sighed. Surely Geralt would disappear with her somewhere to let off some steam later.

Although Geralt had promised not to get intimate with a woman right in front of him, the bard knew that Geralt wouldn't live like a monk. Of course Jaskier was aware of this. It still hurt though. Fuck his stupid feelings for Geralt! Perhaps he should consider Lambert's offer after all. If the man survives. However according to Geralt's reaction, Lambert's survival was far from certain.

When Jaskier came closer to Geralt's table, he was surprised to discover that Geralt wasn't flirting with the woman but trying to get information out of her.

Thank God! If Geralt wanted to have sex with women then Jaskeir didn't want to know about it. Someday Jaskier would get over Geralt, would only see him as a friend. But not now. Now Jaskier was infinitely relieved, even if it was pathetic. 

"At first it was only animals going missing," the woman lamented. "But at some point people also disappeared. The whole city is full of missing person reports pinned to houses and trees. But if you ask me they're all dead. There are rumours of a monster in the sewers. A few people have even reported seeing tentacles there. It's really creepy. I am glad you are here now and that you and your Witcher friend are going to do something about it," she said. "Maybe... maybe you'd like to go out with me sometime afterwards?" she added almost shyly and Jaskier's heart broke once more. How could Geralt turn down an offer like that? The woman was a beauty and Witchers had needs too...

"Hmm," was all Geralt said and Jaskier understood that the other man didn't feel like explaining to the woman why Lambert wanted to eliminate the monsters on his own and probably wouldn't succeed. Besides, he had also promised not to have sex in front of Jaskier.

Jaskier decided to leave immediately after dinner to give Geralt the opportunity to talk to the woman alone. Frustrated, he swallowed the knot in his throat and sat down at the table with Geralt. He could do this. For Geralt, he would try to act normal even if tears prickled in his eyes.

***

During their meal they didn't talk much. Geralt hoped that Jaskier was just tired. It was rarely a good sign when the other man was so quiet.

"Are you tired?" Geralt asked after a while.

Jaskier just nodded and poked around in his food.

"Don't you like it? I ordered bœuf bourguignon for you because I know it is your favourite food, but if you don't want it we can order something else. Maybe you'd rather have cheese and bread?" Geralt said.

"Oh, no, thanks. That's very kind of you. The food is good. I'm just... I'm not very hungry. Maybe it's the rotten smell hanging over the city," Jaskier replied, clearly avoiding his gaze.

Yes, it was true, the sewer smelled terrible. Even if it was better inside the inn.

Jaskier sipped at his beer and ate a little more of the boeuf. Then he got up.

"I think I should go to bed early tonight Geralt. Have a nice evening," he said and took a brief glimpse at the blonde woman Geralt had talked to earlier. Then he left.

What the fuck! Did the bard think that he and the woman...? But Geralt had promised that he wouldn't do that. How could Jaskier think he wouldn't keep his word? Was this the reason why the bard wasn't hungry? Geralt had often heard that heartache was able to drive away the appetite of the strongest men. His stomach knotted in pain. He didn't want to be the cause that the other man had no appetite. Fuck!

Geralt hadn't thought to fuck the woman for one second. Only now did he notice that she was very beautiful. But to his own surprise he wasn't attracted to her at all. Instantly he emptied his beer and followed Jaskier to their room.

***


	9. Chapter 9

Geralt took two steps at a time as he hurried up to their shared room. How could Jaskier think that he would be so ignorant? After the bard confessed that he liked him, he would never... Geralt would never hurt the bard that way. The thought alone was ridiculous! With trembling fingers he opened the door. Sometimes it was easier to face monsters than humans, Geralt thought as he took a deep breath and entered the room.

"Jaskier, I..." he started right away but the bard wouldn't let him finish. With panic in his face he came running towards Geralt.

"She's disappeared. Scary's gone. I must have left the window open. Oh God, it's my fault if anything happens to her. I have to look for her. I heard what you talked about with the woman and with Lambert. There is a monster here and it kills animals and people. Oh shit, Geralt, I..."

Tears ran down the bard's cheeks. Geralt's throat tightened at the sight. Fuck! How do people behave in situations like this? He had absolutely no idea. No one had ever taught him how to show compassion or to calm someone down. And if he was honest, he had never met anyone before where it would have mattered. But it was different with Jaskier. He was the first person in Geralt's life who he cared for. And now he had to suppress the absurd need to embrace the bard. But he quickly dismissed the idea. Jaskier didn't need pity, but someone to help him find the cat. Geralt didn't even want to think about what might have happened to the little creature if it had gone near the sewers. He could only pray that the cat was wise enough to catch her mice somewhere else. Surprised, he realized that he wouldn't be unaffected if something happened to the little creature. That was more than strange.

That little black bastard must have put a spell on him. Cats really were scary creatures. And this specimen had even managed to worm its way into his heart somehow. How odd!

"You stay here Jaskier. I will find the cat. I promise!" he said, and was about to get on his way outside. Just the thought of something happening to Jaskier made his blood freeze in his veins.

"No! I'm certainly not gonna stay in this room and wait. I'll go with you! Besides, Scary might react to my voice if I call for her," the bard said determinedly. Fuck it! He didn't have time to argue. Why couldn't Jaskier see that it was far too dangerous?

"Please, Geralt. I'd go insane here. I promise I'll keep a low profile and stay away from the sewers," the bard begged.

Oh fuck! How could he say no when Jaskier looked at him with his huge puppy eyes.

"Hmm," he muttered in lack of more words, and nodded briefly. Hell, of course the bard is not going to listen to him - he never has before so why would he start now? If he wants to be an idiot and risk his life that's his own choice. But it's incredibly frustrating because the thought of Jaskier getting injured hurts Geralt more than he cares to admit. How could one man be such a nuisance?

But it didn't make any difference anyway. Jaskier would follow him even without permission. With a deep sigh Geralt fastened the shoulder straps with his swords and they set off.

***

The stench outside the inn almost brought Jaskier to his knees. How could people live here? It was almost unbearable. Determined, he followed Geralt. He had to pull himself together. There was no time to show weakness. Even though the horrible smell made him sick. Every minute could be crucial for Scary. Together they hurried through the streets and called for the cat. They got closer and closer to the sewer, but nothing. It was like Scary had vanished into thin air. Eventually when they reached a place where the two sewers merged, they heard someone grunting with effort.   
When they came closer, they saw Lambert fighting against a repulsive creature with tentacles and very sharp teeth. So it was true, there were monsters in the sewer. Jaskier prayd to all the Gods that they didn’t hurt Scary.   
Three of the creatures lay already motionless in the water. Cut off tentacles floated next to the pale purple figures on the water surface. The beast that was just fighting Lambert tried to catch him with its double rows of sharp teeth, but fortunately Lambert was a good fighter. With a few sword strokes he cut off the tentacles of the monster and then impaled it on his sword.

"I am impressed," Geralt yelled approvingly. And if Jaskier hadn't worried so much about Scary, he surely would have been impressed too. But at the moment all his attention was focused on the search for his little friend.

"Thanks," Lambert replied. “But we both know that these are just the children and grandchildren of the beast. You were right. I can't do this alone. I'm glad you're here, Geralt. But you shouldn't have brought Jaskier. It is much too dangerous for the handsome bard," Lambert yelled.

"I'm not here to help you, Lambert. Jaskier's cat is missing. We are here because we are looking for the animal," explained Geralt almost sounding impatient. If Jaskier didn't know better, he could almost have thought that Geralt was jealous. But that was ridiculous. Wishful thinking, that's all!

"Geralt of Rivia, you are full of surprises. You're going to this filthy hell just because your little travelling companion lost his cat?" Lambert shook his head in disbelief and laughed as he cleaned his sword and climbed out of the water. Jaskier didn't see what was funny about that. Scary was not just any cat after all. But before he could say anything back he suddenly saw the black cat near the sewer. She was chasing a rat.

"Scary!" he yelled. Oh God. She was way too close to the edge of the canal. These terrible monsters could grasp her with ease with their disgusting tentacles.

The cat gazed up and looked at him in surprise. For a short moment it seemed like her eyes flashed blue. But how could that be? Jaskeir must have imagined that. He wanted to run to her, but suddenly something pulled him back. He looked down and with shock he discovered the purple tentacle that had wrapped itself around his foot. Fuck! Jaskier screamed but it didn't help. With a snap the monster pulled him towards the water. The bard lost his footing and fell forcefully to the ground. He felt a dull pain in the back of his head as he banged it on the cobblestone of the floor. Then everything went black.

***

Geralt was distracted by Lambert, therefore he noticed the attack of the other Zeugl too late. There were three other smaller monsters and a bigger one. Fuck! The rest of the brood and the mother, who was really huge. Only when it was already too late did he hear Jaskier's scream. First the bard called for the cat and after a few more moments he screamed as he was grabbed by a Zeugl and thrown to the ground. Tentacles had also wrapped themselves around Geralt's legs. Quickly he reached for his swords to cut the nasty things off. But he took too long. He would never get to Jaskier in time to help him. Fuck! The Zeugl would push the unconscious bard behind its double row of teeth and simply eat him. This wasn't supposed to happen! Desperately he tried to free himself faster from his attackers to get to Jaskier, but deep inside he knew that he would be too late. But when he thought all was lost, something incredible happened. With a loud roar that was not at all reminiscent of the usual meowing, Scary suddenly grew rapidly. Geralt almost dropped a sword. What the fuck!

A few moments later the little cat was replaced by a man-sized panther with glowing blue eyes. Furiously the animal jumped at the Zeugl who had grabbed Jaskier. With her big sharp claws she cut off the tentacle that was wrapped around the bard's foot. Then she tore up the rest of the purple monster. Fucking Hell! Of course Jaskier wouldn't just befriend with a normal cat, but would choose a Tendorm as his companion! A fucking Tendorm! Geralt didn't know they still existed. As far as he knew they were very rare. By all the Gods, this was so typical for the bard. Geralt did not know whether to laugh or cry. He was so relieved that the Tendorm had saved Jaskier. He almost forgot that he was attacked by a Zeugl himself.

"Fucking hell Geralt! Your bard not only has a Witcher at his side, but he also has a Tendrom as a bodyguard. He must be the best-guarded singer in the whole country," Lambert yelled as he fought one of the smaller Zeugl. A laugh escaped Geralt's mouth. Yes, Lambert was right. Only Jaskier could succeed in gaining the trust of a rare and leery Tendorm.

From the moment they had help from the huge panther everything went very fast. Within a very short time they managed to hunt down the younger Zeugl and then they killed the oldest and largest Zeugl together. Then the magnificent panther shrank back to its original size and snuggled up close to the still unconscious bard. It was almost absurd how the big dangerous panther became a sweet little cat again.

"I was wrong. It was good that you brought the bard. Tendorme only transform when their chosen leaders are in danger. So without the pretty bard there wouldn't have been a panther, and without the panther we wouldn't have had a chance against the Zeugl," Lambert said and patted Geralt on the shoulder. “All the more reason to steal the pretty little bard from you,” he laughed and Geralt felt an unknown rage rising within him.


	10. Chapter 10

"Oh God, Geralt! This is one of those moments where I really regret that I am not a painter. I would give anything to be able to capture this moment for eternity. Is there anything more entertaining than a grumpy Witcher carrying a bard bridal style? This is just too hilarious!" Lambert laughed and almost fell over a rock because he paid so little attention to where he was going.

"Shut up Lambert! Jaskier hit his head when he fell and he is still unconscious as you can see. Am I supposed to just leave him there next to the sewer?" Geralt growled. 

Lambert got on his nerves. Not only did he constantly try to flirt with the bard, but he also made fun of Geralt and the Witcher did not like that at all. It was high time to move on and leave Lambert behind. 

"Aren't you afraid this bard will destroy your reputation, Geralt? When people see you like this, they might assume that you are not as dangerous as you want them to believe. They certainly have already noticed that your little bard isn't afraid of you. And just between you and me, it's almost touching how much you care about him," Lambert continued. 

"Fuck you, Lambert!" Geralt spat out. 

The other man laughed out loud.

"No, I don't think that would be a good idea. But if I could have your pretty little bard..."

Lambert chuckled even more as Geralt started to growl. 

"Oh God, it's just way too much fun to tease you. I think I'll travel with you for a while," Lambert announced without even considering that Geralt might not want that. 

Fucking asshole! 

"We are doing very fine without your presence Lambert!" Geralt replied angrily. 

Lambert just laughed. Was everything a joke to the other man? 

"Oh, I bet you are, Geralt. But I'm sure Jaskier will not object to my company." 

And that's exactly the problem, Geralt reasoned angrily. He didn't like the idea of having to watch Lambert flirt with Jaskier day in, day out. Fuck! He had to find a way to get rid of the other Witcher.

***

When Jaskier slowly came to, he first had the feeling of being on a ship because everything was moving. It was of course also quite possible that these were just the aftereffects of the fall. He remembered that he wanted to keep Scary from getting too close to the sewer. Then he had noticed that one of the monsters had reached him with a tentacle and he had fallen on his head with full force. After that, everything went black. Apparently Geralt had managed to save him once again, otherwise he would surely not be alive anymore. 

Unless... unless he was swimming in the canal water and the monster was just about to pull him closer. In this case, he would only have fainted for a few moments. But wouldn't an unconscious body sink in water like a stone? Only wood remained on the surface. So this whole sewer water theory was bullshit. Quickly he opened his eyes. At first he only saw black, but it wasn't the blackness of the night, but... but Geralt's leather jacket? 

What the fuck? Confused, he raised his head and noticed that Geralt was carrying him. And he hadn't just thrown him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes but carried him in his arms like a child. Scary was cuddled between them and purred. Jaskier felt heat rising on his cheeks. Embarrassed, he cleared his throat. 

"Oh welcome back, handsome. I was starting to worry about you. It would be a great pity if your pretty head had been damaged. You were out for quite a while and slept through all the fun with the Zeugls," Jaskier heard Lambert saying. 

When the bard turned his head he saw that the other Witcher was walking beside them. 

“I’m all right. My head hurts terribly though," Jaskier said and carefully touched the big bump on the back of his head. 

“Did you get rid of all the monsters?" he wanted to know. 

“Yes, they are all dead," Geralt replied brusquely. 

Huh? Was the Witcher mad at him? Maybe it had something to do with the fact that Geralt had to save him once again. Surely he was tired of playing Jaskier’s personal bodyguard all the time. 

“I'm sorry you had to save my sorry ass again, Geralt," he said contritely. 

“I didn't save you," was the still very terse response. 

Okay, so if it wasn't that, then what was it? What did he do to piss off Geralt this time?

“Oh, so I guess I have to thank you, Lambert,” Jaskier said still confused about Geralt's bad mood. 

“Scary saved you. She is a Tendorm," Geralt explained and he sounded so offended as if it was an impudence that Jaskier hadn't come up with it on his own. 

What the heck! Tendorme were just a myth! 

Quizzically he studied the purring cat in his arms, who looked at him with her big eyes. Did Geralt really want to make him believe that this sweet innocent creature was a killer? What the hell was the other man trying to accomplish? Why did Geralt lie to him? Did he hate the cat so much that he had to invent horror stories? This was absurd.

"Fucking hell, Geralt. I don't believe one word you say. I know you don't like cats, but you'll have to put up with this one, cause we are a package deal," Jaskier said determinedly and slightly offended.

Geralt let out a puff of air that somehow sounded frustrated. 

"Yes Geralt, don't bother lying to the pretty bard. We all know that I am the hero of this story," Lambert laughed. “I think you should write a song about me, handsome. It's the least you can do for me, don't you think?"

Yeah, the other man was right. This was a good idea. After all, it was the only way for Jaskier to show his appreciation. 

"Yes, as soon as my head stops pounding, I'll get started writing a song for you," the bard promised. 

Geralt's grip became painfully tighter. What the fuck was wrong with his friend? 

"You can put me down now, Geralt. Even if my head hurts like crazy, my legs are fine,' Jaskier suggested. 

He had no idea how to deal with the physical proximity to the Witcher. Especially when the man was in such a strange mood. 

"Oh, or I could carry you, handsome. It would be a pleasure to hold such a cute bard in my arms,” Lambert flirted and Jaskier’s cheeks turned red like a tomato. He was not used to being courted like this all the time. Geralt's grip got even tighter. 

"No!" was all the Witcher growled. 

***

Lambert was very lucky that Geralt had no hand free at the moment. Otherwise he would have pushed the other man into the sewer. Oh it would have been a huge satisfaction to see the surprised face of this arrogant fellow if he had fallen into the stinking broth. Not that it made much difference. They were all completely filthy and needed a bath. Lambert dragged one of the smaller dead Zeugl on a string behind him to prove to the mayor that the job was done. They had thrown the remaining dead beasts on a pile beside the canal. The mayor would have to make sure that the city was thoroughly cleaned anyway if he didn't want to have the same problem again in a few years. 

"I can really go on my own now Geralt. You don't have to carry me," Jaskier protested but Geralt didn't want to let the bard down just so Lambert could carry him. Without a word, he stomped on with determination. Lambert just laughed. Fucking bastard!

A short time later they arrived at the inn and finally they could say goodbye to Lambert, who had to visit the mayor. At least for the moment. What a relief. Geralt ordered a bath and carried Jaskier up the stairs to their room. Fortunately, nobody paid attention to the cat. Everyone was too busy staring at them. After all, it wasn't every day that they saw a completely drenched and dirty Witcher carrying his bard bridal style. 

***

Jaskier just wanted to sleep. Even if he hadn't fought like Geralt or Lambert, the events of the last hours had been very exhausting for him too. And Geralt's strange behaviour didn't make it any better. But the most important thing was that Scary was all right. A Tendorm? How did Geralt get the idea to tell him such nonsense? He lovingly scratched Scary behind his ears. 

"Like a cute little thing like you could be a killing monster. Geralt must be crazy if he thinks that I would believe this bullshit just for one second." 

"Meow," was the answer.

"Exactly!" Jaskier said. “Meow! Because you are a cat, not a Tendorm!" 

Completely exhausted, Jaskier slipped out of his clothes. Geralt had gone downstairs to get some soap and towels. They would have to send their clothes away for cleaning. Even though Jaskier was not as dirty as Geralt, his clothes stank terribly as well. 

Suddenly the door opened and the cold breeze from outside caused goosebumps on Jaskier's naked skin. The bard didn't even turn around at first. He knew it had to be Geralt. But then he heard a rumble like something fell to the ground. 

"Fuck! the Witcher cursed. 

Jaskier was now curious what was going on behind his back and turned around. Geralt stood in the doorway. The soap and the towels had fallen to the floor. With a shocked face and huge yellow eyes, he stared at Jaskier. 

"What the fuck are you doing?"; he wanted to know and his voice sounded even more hoarse than usual. 

Oh come on! Jaskier was far too exhausted for Geralt's strange mood.

"What do you think? I'm taking a bath. What else does it look like?" Jaskier replied. 

Geralt blinked, then he looked at Jaskier from top to bottom as if he hadn't seen him naked a thousand times before. What was wrong with the other man? 

"Geralt, you can't really be upset because I use the bath water first. You're much dirtier than me. It would make no sense at all to let you take a bath first. We've always done it this way," Jaskier tried to explain.

He didn't see the problem. Maybe they should order two bathtubs in the future? It would cost more, but if Geralt had to make such a big deal out of it...

All of a sudden Geralt looked like a chased animal. Desperately he stared down on himself. 

"Fuck!" he rasped, and then he was gone. 

He just fucking left! The soap and towels were still on the floor and the door was wide open. 

What the actual fuck was wrong with the Witcher? Jaskier was beginning to suspect that the sewage was somehow poisoned or something like that because Geralt was acting more than strange. 

With a deep sigh the bard fetched the towels and the soap, closed the door, and then got into the tub. He was just too tired for this nonsense. Besides, his head still hurt. Whatever it was, Jaskier had to sleep first. He quickly rubbed himself clean with the soap and got out of the still hot water. It wasn't his fault that the water would probably be cold if Geralt didn't come back soon. 

Totally exhausted, he slipped between the soft warm sheets. Scary snuggled up to him and purred. Before he fell asleep he decided to ask Lambert what could be wrong with Geralt. Maybe the other Witcher had an idea.

  
  
  



	11. Chapter 11

When Geralt hurriedly left the room he shared with Jaskier, he knew only one thing: he needed to get laid like yesterday! What else could be the reason for his raging hard-on just because the other man was naked in front of him? He had seen Jaskier without clothes a thousand times before, damn it. The only reasonable explanation he could think of for his reaction was that he hadn’t had sex for weeks. 

This dry spell had now come to an end, Geralt decided. 

He would get his own room, order his own bath, and then see if he could find a pretty woman at the inn with whom he could let off some steam. If he didn't find anyone, he decided he would take the job in his own hands, literally. There was no way that a little pale skin could have bothered him so much. Geralt shook his head in annoyance. 

A few moments later he sat down at a table in the corner of the pub and ordered a beer. The waitress was quite pretty, not as young as some, but young enough to still appeal to him. Slowly he drank his beer and watched her. She had long red hair and lush curves, and the by the way she looked at him Geralt was sure that she would be only too willing. Excellent!

He had promised Jaskier that he wouldn't have sex right in front of him, but since Geralt had his own room tonight, he was free to do whatever he pleased. The only problem was that the idea of the woman's large bare breasts and voluptuous hips did not arouse him. Not even a bit! Fuck! What was wrong with him? The woman came to his table several times and asked if he wanted something to eat or another beer. So he had more than enough opportunity to invite her to his room, but he didn't. Geralt didn't understand why, but it felt wrong. 

Frustrated, he emptied his beer and went back to his room alone. 

***

"Stop fidgeting," Geralt growled into Jaskier's ear. 

What the fuck! It was easy for the other man to say so, but for Jaskier it was still unusual to sit still on a horse for hours. Everything hurt. Especially his back and his butt."Even though he had to admit that traveling on a horse had its advantages, it was incredibly exhausting becuase they didn't take breaks like they did when he was walking Scary was curled up in front of Jaskier and slept in peace. Lucky thing! To her, Roach's back was like a bed. 

"I can't stop. You have no idea how much my ass hurts, Geralt!" Jaskier complained.

“For fuck's sake Jaskier, stop talking about your ass…” Geralt gritted out and Jaskeir wondered again what the fuck was wrong with the other man. 

***

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Geralt had no idea why, but slowly the matter got completely out of control. Not only had he failed to invite the red-haired waitress to his room the previous night, but frustratingly he had also not managed to ban Jaskier out of his thoughts during his...replacement program. Against his will, images of Jaskier had crept into his head, images of his big blue eyes, his red shiny lips, and of his pale smooth skin, which would certainly feel soft under Geralt's fingers...

By all the gods, Geralt couldn't help but groan Jaskier's name when he finally came. Fortunately, he was much too tired afterwards to torture himself with a guilty conscience for too long. But now he was again in exactly the same situation as last night. 

Jaskier’s restless squirming led to Geralt having a raging boner in his pants. Again! Fuck! Even if Geralt suddenly felt attracted to the bard for some obscure reason, it would still be fatal to their friendship if the other man noticed. Jaskier had confessed his feelings to Geralt, the bard was in love with him! A one night stand would certainly not be what the other man wanted. And how could Geralt give him more? Witchers were not created for relationships.

Of course it was not true that Witchers had no feelings, but in reality they were nothing more than fighting machines. Fighting machines that were needed by mankind to get rid of all the monsters. But after they had done their service, everyone was happy to get rid of them. There was no room for love or a relationship among all the fighting, the struggles, and the bad memories. It was a miracle that Geralt had managed to keep Jaskier as a friend. But he almost fucked that up too. 

***

With a sigh, Jaskier tried to find a better sitting position again and slid back a little bit, but Geralt stopped him immediately. With a loud growl that sounded almost desperate, he pushed Jaskier away. But the Witcher wasn't fast enough, because suddenly Jaskier knew why Geralt didn't want him to move. 

Shit! Geralt was hard and his dick was now pressing against Jaskier’s ass. Shocked and at the same time extremely aroused, Jaskier gasped. What the freaking hell was happening? Why would Geralt have a boner without a reason? But what reason would he have for...for this reaction? There wasn't a pretty woman nearby. There was nothing but the forest, Geralt, Lambert, and Jaskier. So there was no reason for a boner!

Geralt obviously couldn't stand the other Witcher, and as far as Jaskier was concerned the Witcher had made it more than clear that he wasn't interested in the bard that way. Even though...a man could dream. 

"I am sorry! It's been weeks since..." Geralt murmured and he sounded so embarrassed that Jaskier almost felt sorry for him. 

And of course! This had to be the explanation. For a short moment Jaskier had considered that Geralt... But of course that was nonsense! Resigned, the bard swallowed down the disappointment. 

He was an idiot for even hoping that for one second Geralt could want him! And in the end, this situation was really Jaskier's own fault. Geralt cared enough for him to keep his promise. As far as the bard could tell, the Witcher hasn't had sex since Jaskier's confession. Damn it! Since they practically always shared a room or sleeping place, the poor man could not even provide for his own needs by masturbating!

Jaskier felt like the worst friend in the world. Because of his stupid feelings for Geralt, the other man no longer dared to act on his urges. Jesus! This had to stop now! He really couldn't expect the other man to never have sex again. Oh God! Jaskier was so ashamed. With burning cheeks, he moved away from Geralt. 

"I am sorry too," he whispered as quietly as possible. He didn't want Lambert to hear any of this. For sure the other Witcher would make fun of Geralt. 

Perhaps it would be better if he accepted Lambert's offer. He didn't want to, but maybe it would be for the best. At some point they would find the girl and then their paths would separate anyway. A lump formed in his throat when he thought about leaving Geralt. 

"I think...I think it would be better for me to walk for a bit," he said and cleared his throat. “And Geralt..." he turned around to look the Witcher in the eye. “You don't have to hold back because of me any more. It was very nice of you to show consideration for me, but I think you should...act as you did before,” he stammered and hurriedly got off the horse.

***

Jaskier's reaction was like a punch in the gut for some reason. For a short moment it felt as if Geralt couldn't breathe anymore. 

Fuck! What was wrong with him? Shouldn't he be happy that his friend seemed to be over him? That he even encouraged him to have sex again? Helplessly he watched the bard descend from Roach. But as Geralt had already feared, Lambert stopped at the next fork and saw that Jaskier was no longer riding on Roach with Geralt. And of course the fucker offered the bard to ride with him. And to Geralt's annoyance, Jaskeir accepted the offer. Geralt had no choice but to watch how Lambert snuggled up tightly to the bard from behind and looked at Geralt with a triumphant smile. 

Fucking bastard! Lambert knew exactly what this was doing to Geralt! Oh, he'd get back at that smug asshole!

The only comfort was that Scary hissed and scratched when Jaskier had tried to put her on Lambert's horse. Jaskier was completely baffled, but he had no choice but to put her back on Roach. And had Geralt not known better, he would have sworn that her meowing sounded very accusatory afterwards. It seemed like she wasn't thrilled about the new seat change at all.

When Geralt rode ahead so that he wouldn't have to look at the other two men all the time, Scary moved a little closer to him and started to purr as if she was trying to calm him down. Without thinking, Geralt ran his hand through her fur and for the first time in his long life, a cat let him pet it. And wow...Geralt was surprised that a simple touch like this could really give some comfort.

***

  
  


  
  



	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took me so long but real life got in the way and so I didn't have enough time to continue writing. But here we go. I hope you enjoy!

The weather became colder and colder the further north they went. Jaskier was more grateful than ever for his grey coat. In the last few days he had started to walk again most of the time. Not only because he was afraid to get back on the horse with Geralt, and he was somehow uncomfortable with Lambert's physical proximity, but also because the exercise kept him warmer. Neither Lambert nor Geralt felt the icy cold like he did. Strangely enough, although in the last few days they were always forced to spend the night outside, he hardly ever froze at night. It was as if he had an invisible blanket that spread over him as soon as he fell asleep. Often the fire had already gone out in the morning when he woke up and he still had not frozen in the night. Jaskier suspected that one of the two Witchers had used a small spell to help, but both denied it. Geralt claimed firmly that it was Scary who warmed him. It was funny that Geralt always insisted that Scary protected him. The cat and the Witcher had grown closer lately. Most of the time Scary travelled on Roach with Geralt. 

Once Lambert tried to take the animal on his horse. Scary almost scratched the man's face and Geralt laughed out loud. He seemed to like the fact that Scary couldn't stand Lambert. But even though his furry little friend seemed to like Geralt now, she always slept purring in Jaskier's arms at night. Of course, the little animal warmed him a little during his sleep, but to warm his whole body she would have had to be much bigger. Well, in the end it didn't matter. Whatever was responsible for him not freezing to death at night, he was grateful for it. 

A few days after crossing the borders of Kaedwen, they came to a small village near Branard. There they could finally sleep in an inn again. A real bed, warm food, and a hot bath would surely work wonders. Jaskier was sure he would feel human again afterwards. 

After Geralt's strange reaction when they last shared a room and a bathtub, he had suggested that they could take separate rooms this time and Geralt agreed. Jaskier tried not to think about what that meant. But it was a hopeless business. Of course there was no way he was able to stop his mind from thinking about the reason why Geralt would need a room of his own. The Witcher wanted to reactivate his sex life. 

Fuck! This had to stop! 

He didn't want to pine for the other man all his life for fuck's sake! This was stupid! Geralt wouldn't live like a monk only because Jaskier was stupid enough to fall in love with him. 

Geralt would never see more in him. They would always be just friends. Even when Lambert suggested that Jaskier could share the room with him and Geralt got angry, Jaskier knew Geralt wasn't jealous. He just didn't like Lambert. It was possible that Geralt didn’t like the idea that Lambert and Jaskier became friends too. No one knew what was going on in Geralt's head. The Witcher was a constant mystery to Jaskier. 

With a sigh, Jaskier undressed and got into the steaming hot bath. After some time his muscles began to relax. Jaskier decided not to go downstairs after the bath, but to instead order some food to his room. He really didn't want to see who Geralt took to his room. 

Damn, there would be a time when Jaskier would be ready to seek his pleasure with other people again. But he knew he wasn't ready yet. Now he submerged his head in the tub and was annoyed that once again there was nothing he could do about the stupid tears that were burning in his eyes. 

Fucking feelings!

***

Geralt looked through the room. He had the feeling he was being watched. Of course he was used to being stared at by people, but this was different. It felt like...like a predator looking at its prey, or like the prey wouldn't let the predator out of its sight. Geralt could not see who was watching him.  However, a few people came into consideration.  A group of young men watched him suspiciously, the host also kept an eye on him, and also a young woman who was sitting alone at a table further back in the corner. 

At first glance he hadn't noticed her at all. She wore the brown-green clothes of a hunter and was also armed with a bow and arrows. When she felt Geralt's gaze on her, she smiled and winked at him. The Witcher let his gaze glide over her figure. Her body was obscured by her cloak, but her face was pretty. It seemed almost innocent like a young girl, but Geralt was sure that was not the case. She must have been in her mid-twenties and as impudently as she looked at him now, she was certainly anything but innocent. On the other hand, Jaskier also had sex with more people than he could count and was still innocent at heart. The thought of the bard with others spread a sour taste in his mouth and he quickly dismissed it. For a moment he considered smiling at the girl, but if he was honest he didn't feel like flirting, let alone more. So he turned his eyes away, not wanting her to think he was interested.

***

When Jaskier sat down on the bed waiting for his food, Scary immediately snuggled up in his lap. Her purring calmed him down pretty quickly as usual. Lost in thought, he stroked her fur. At some point he would probably have to re-colour her fur. If someone looked closely, they would already see that the hair at her paw regrew white. He still had some of the dye left. But when he thought about the messy procedure he pulled a face and decided to colour her paw when he was alone again. As long as he had Geralt, and at the moment even Lambert, he didn't need protection by a fake black cat. 

A knock at the door jolted him from his thoughts. Carefully he put Scary on the bed and went to the door. He suspected it was either the food or Geralt. Turned out it was the former. In front of him stood a pretty young woman with red hair that fell halfway down her back, countless freckles, amused green eyes, and one of the most delicate snub noses he had ever seen. Before he had made the mistake of falling in love with Geralt, he would certainly have tried to seduce her. She looked really cute. Curious, he let his gaze drift over her body and noticed that she was wearing hunter's clothing. A bow and arrows hung over her shoulders. In one hand she was holding a plate of bread and cheese and in the other a beer mug. 

"I'm bringing your food, bard. Although I think it's a pity that you don't delight us with your singing downstairs. The people here could use some joy," she said and handed him his food.

"Thank you," he replied. “But I don't feel like singing today. I am sorry." 

Curious she tilted her head and looked at him closely. 

"Heartbreak?" she guessed boldly. 

Jaskier stared at her with wide eyes. Were his feelings for Geralt that obvious? 

"Don't look at me like that, bard. One would have to be blind not to see that you are pining for someone. And I bet it is not a fine lady of the court," she stated and laughed at his shocked face. 

"I... I..." Jaskier stammered. 

"Don't worry, your secret's safe with me. And because I am a nice person, I won't take the silent Witcher into my bed tonight, but the other one..." she explained with a conspiratorial wink.

***

Geralt was already drinking his second beer when Lambert joined him. 

"Where is our handsome bard?" Lambert wanted to know. 

Geralt hated it when Lambert called him that - pretty bard. Admittedly Jaskier was handsome, with his big ocean-blue eyes, gently curved lips, and soft porcelain-coloured skin. 

But his friend was so much more. He was loyal and kind and brave, even if one often didn't notice the last fact at first glance. Jaskier was a better friend than Geralt would ever be and it simply bothered him when Lambert, who didn't really know the bard, constantly showered him with compliments. It was like the other Witcher didn't deserve to make the bard blush. 

"Hm," was all Geralt answered. 

"Talkative as ever, aren't you?" Lambert remarked with dry sarcasm. 

Geralt decided to ignore the statement and waved for the innkeeper. "What can I do for you?" the man wanted to know in a gruff voice. 

Geralt was already used to the fact that people didn't like having Witchers around. Everyone needed their help but nobody wanted to deal with them. Except for Jaskier. The bard was one of the few people who had treated Geralt like any other from the beginning. 

"I'd like a beer, and what can you recommend for dinner?" Geralt asked the man.

"All I can offer you is bread and cheese or an oatmeal vegetable stew. We haven't had meat here for a long time," the man explained. 

"Why?" Geralt wanted to know. 

He had a hunch the lack of meat would be connected to a monster. 

The innkeeper sighed.

"On the one hand, there are wolves in this area. They're taking our chickens and sheep. Even cows are not safe from them because we don’t have the normal grey wolves here but the big mountain wolves. We're a poor area. No farmer can afford to lose at least one of his animals every month. That's why most people only have animals for their own use, which they lock up in the stables," the man explained, shrugging his shoulders. 

"You could hunt. The forest is practically on your doorstep and I don't think wolves would attack in the daylight," Lambert suggested even though he already knew that this wasn’t possible because of a monster. 

He was sure that the wolves weren’t the only problem of the villagers. He guessed that they were dealing with a Leshy in the forest. 

"Nobody goes into the forest willingly, Witcher! A mighty creature is lurking there. No one can defeat it and no one who goes into the forest returns, except for my niece," the landlord told them in a shaky voice. 

Geralt looked at Lambert and he knew that the other Witcher came to the same conclusion. 

"It seems to be a Leshy, what do you think?" Geralt guessed. 

Lambert nodded in agreement. 

"At least it sounds like a Leshy. Maybe we should take a little trip into the woods tomorrow," Lambert replied. 

"Yeah, we really should do something about that," Geralt agreed. 

"I don't think that's a good idea. Even if you are Witchers, you cannot defeat the creature. And even if you did, it will come back. It always does. Believe me, there's nothing you can do. The only person who can leave the forest alive is Sibiletta. She is also the one who sometimes provides us with meat. But it's getting colder now. The creature always needs the meat for itself or for the wolves in winter. So Sibiletta hadn't been successful in her hunt for weeks now," the man explained, more talkative than Geralt had first suspected.

Geralt knew instantly that Sibiletta had to be the girl in the corner and an unpleasant thought crossed his mind. If the creature in the forest really was a Lashy and if the monster was able to come back every time it was beaten in a fight then it had to be bonded to a human in the village. All signs indicated that this person was Sibiletta. Fucking hell! They would have to kill her! Frowning he looked to the corner but the girl was gone. 

  
  
  



	13. Chapter 13

“Come on Geralt! You can't be serious. We need Jaskier, or rather his little friend. We would be stupid to go without bringing our best asset with us," Lambert said. 

"No way! We leave Jaskier out of this. I won't risk his safety just to get help from the Tendorm. Forget it!" Geralt objected and shook his head dismissively. 

Lambert looked at Geralt for a while and smirked.

"You should tell the bard how you feel about him, my friend. I don't think he will get the message on his own," Lambert said seriously. 

Geralt could only stare at the other man. What the heck?

"What the hell are you talking about? Jaskier is my friend and nothing more!" Geralt countered. 

Lambert laughed out loud. 

"Yes, for sure he is! That's why you almost burst with jealousy every time I flirt with him," Lambert replied amused. "Listen, Geralt. That's really none of my business. Keep telling yourself that Jaskier's just your friend. But remember that the poor man will not wait forever until you finally understand what you want from him. He's too pretty to be alone forever. Believe me, there are enough young men and women who would love to warm our sweet bard on cold nights."

Geralt opened and closed his mouth like a fish. 

WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL WAS LAMBERT TALKING ABOUT? 

Was it so obvious that he was attracted to the bard lately? Fuck! 

"There's no point in denying it, Geralt. You are as transparent as a clear mountain lake. I think the only reason you're not courting the bard is that you think Witchers can't have a relationship. Am I right? Oh, don't get me wrong. I can understand you. I've thought the same for a long time. But it's bullshit. I hope I don't have to tell you that Jaskier wouldn't turn you down? He is obviously as much into you as you are into him. So where is the problem?"

Geralt shook his head. They didn't have time for this now. At the moment it was necessary to fight a Leshen. How could it be that their conversation had drifted from the monster in the forest to Geralt's feelings for Jaskier? And by all means, Lambert was the last person he wanted to talk about this.

"Okay, I see. You don't want to talk about it, nor do you want for Jaskier and his cat to join us in the forest. So let's go. But you should at least tell your bard to wait for us here," Lambert said with a sigh. 

Geralt just nodded. What could he say? Lambert was right. He didn't feel like talking about his confusing feelings for the bard and he didn't want to take Jaskier and Scary into the forest. Goddamn it. Geralt had always left Jaskier behind when he had to fight monsters. After all, Jaskier was a singer and not a fighter. Even with the Tendorm by his side. 

***

Jaskier already knew it was Geralt by the way the Witcher knocked on the door. Oh by all the Gods! He was in way too deep already if he was even able to recognize Geralt’s way to knock on a door!

“Come in!” he yelled frustrated with himself.

Geralt opened the door and once again the sight of his friend almost took Jaskier's breath away. Fuck! Would this ever stop? 

"Lambert and I need to go into the forest to fight the Leshen. I think it's better if you stay here with Scary," the Witcher ordered without beating about the bush. 

Jaskier shrugged his shoulders. This was nothing new. Geralt always left him behind if it was possible. And Jaskier was very grateful for that. He would only be in the way and Geralt would have to worry about his safety too. The two Witchers certainly had enough to do with fighting the Leshen.

"Okay," Jaskier therefore replied. 

It wasn't like he would be much help in a fight against a monster anyway. His talents lay elsewhere. Geralt took a deep breath and for a short moment Jaskier had the feeling as if his friend wanted to say something, but then Geralt just nodded and left without another word. Jaskier sighed. Witchers were certainly able to fight against all sorts of monsters but their social skills were extremely poor. And lately Geralt had been more than strange. Judging from his tense shoulders, Jaskier suspected that his friend didn't have sex the night before. After all, the bard knew from the past that Geralt always seemed a little more relaxed the morning after. Jaskier knew that there was no reason to feel happy about the fact that Geralt didn't take a girl into his room, because of course it didn't change anything about the general situation. Nevertheless, there was a smile spreading across his face. 

***

The first thing Geralt noticed when they went deeper into the forest was that it was much too quiet. This was an unmistakable sign that a Leshen controlled the wildlife of the forest. Every moment the Witcher expected to be attacked by feral wolves or that the roots of the trees would reach for them. 

But nothing happened. It was strange. Almost as if the Leshen was holding back. But why would it do that? It didn't make sense. After half an eternity they reached a clearing. 

Geralt was sure that the Leshen must have some kind of plan. It would never let them come this far into the woods for no reason. Geralt sensed that Lambert became restless as well. What was that beast up to? Once again he noticed how much he preferred simple monsters like Zeugl. Zeugl were not stupid, but when he fought them he never had the feeling that they were three steps ahead of him. On the contrary, Geralt always saw ahead of them. He only had to defend himself against their blows and try to strike in between. It was different with Leshen. And it looked like this one was particularly cunning. Geralt had the feeling that the Leshen was waiting for something. But what was it waiting for? 

"I must admit I'm beginning to get nervous. Why doesn't the beast attack?" Lambert said exactly what Geralt thought. 

"He's up to something," Geralt said and Lambert nodded. 

They were now standing in the middle of the clearing. Still, nothing could be heard, no birds were singing, no wind was howling, nothing! 

It was frightening. 

***

Jaskier did not know what to do with the sunny day, so he decided to take a walk through the village. Scary was certainly glad to go out. Maybe she would be able to catch a mouse. 

So he put the cat in his shoulder bag and left the inn. He was wondering whether he should order a bath for Geralt for the evening. Normally the Witcher always came back from a fight soaked in blood, slime or other nasty fluids. But Jaskier decided against it. After all, he had no idea how long the two Witchers would be gone and Geralt prefered his bath very hot.

Outside it was icy although the sun was shining. The mountains were already covered with snow but in the valley everything was still green. Only the roofs of the wooden houses were white from hoarfrost. But it was clear that it wouldn't be long before the snow arrived down here too. 

Everything seemed peaceful. Children played on the path and women hung out the laundry.

"Hey Bard! Are you enjoying the last rays of sunshine before the weather gets worse again? I am sure in a few days there will be snow," a woman said.

Huh? Where had Sibiletta suddenly come from? He hadn't seen her coming.

"Ahem. Yeah. That's one way of putting it. I am waiting for Geralt and Lambert to return from their...mission," he explained. 

"I know. I've just come from the forest. They said you should meet them there," she said and looked him straight in the eyes. 

Alarm bells in the back of his head shrilled very loud. Jaskier was sure that Sibiletta wasn't telling the truth. He doubted that Geralt or Lambert wanted him in the forest. The Witcher had specifically told him to wait here. And Jaskier would not be any help, but just another problem, as Geralt once put it so nicely. And the Witcher was right, of course. Jaskier for sure couldn't help them fighting and Geralt would have to watch out for him as well. 

"I'd rather wait," he therefore replied quickly. 

"I'm afraid you have no choice, Bard. There are only two possibilities. Either you come with me willingly, or I'll have to force you. Please be reasonable. I don't want to hurt you," she said and looked at him pleadingly. 

It was clear that she really didn't want to hurt him. But she would have to if he refused to cooperate. Shit! This was bad. Very bad!

It was likely that the Leshen forced her to do it. She was probably just the messenger. But that didn't make matters any better. Jaskier sighed. Why did he always get into these situations? And why the hell wasn't Geralt here to save him? 

Fuck!

***


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3 <3 <3 Comments are duly appreciated <3 <3 <3

"What the fuck! The Leshen isn't alone. I told you we should take Jaskier and the cat with us," Lambert said and Geralt followed his gaze. 

Two figures appeared out of the forest and were now coming right towards them. Geralt and Lambert immediately took their swords and put themselves in a fighting position. Only then Geralt looked more closely. One figure was definitely a Leshen as Geralt could easily recognize by the huge antlers and the root-like long hands. But the other figure was a beautiful young woman. 

What the heck? Was this..? Could it be a Huldra? 

Geralt had heard a lot about these creatures, but he had never seen one. He knew only one thing: Huldras were immensely powerful. And together with the Leshen, she was certainly invincible. Fuck! He had never heard of Leshen allying themselves with other creatures. This was bad! Really bad!

"Fuck! Why is there a woman next to the Leshen?" Lambert asked, alarmed.

"I think it must be a Huldra," Geralt hissed.

"A Huldra! Fuck! I didn't think these creatures still existed. You know we are more than fucked if you are right, Geralt? Bloody hell! Since when do these monsters team up?"

"We will know if we are right if we manage to see her back. Huldras appear to be young women on the front but if they turn around they look like old trees. Some of them even have fox tails," Gerlat explained.

"Why the fuck do you know such things, Geralt? I thought they were mythical creatures."

"Yeah, so did I. But it seems like we were wrong," Geralt replied more calmly then he felt. 

Slowly the two figures came closer and stopped short before they reached Lambert and Geralt. At first glance they didn't look like they were going to attack. Besides, they could have done that from a distance. After all, Geralt knew they didn't even have to do it themselves. Both of the creatures were able to use everything that lived in the forest to fight against the Witchers.

"Welcome to our forest Witchers. It's an honour to have you here. Every magical creature is welcome in this forest. We just don't allow humans to be here," Geralt heard the woman speak, but to his surprise he realized that her mouth was not moving. 

What the fuck? Was she able to communicate by telepathy? 

She must have seen his surprised look because she turned her gaze towards him. 

"Yes, my voice is only in your head, Witcher. And your assumption was right. I am a Huldra. There are not many of us left. Therefore it shouldn't be a surprise to you that you never met one of us before," she said without talking. "I know what you want, but I cannot let you destroy my forest spirit. The Leshen and I live in symbiosis. I need him and he needs me."

"The Leshen killed people!" Geralt complained. 

"No, that's not true. We are not murdering anyone. But many monsters are living here in the forest. I can't guarantee that they don't harm humans. These monsters get refuge in this forest. If you promise not to harm supernatural creatures you are under my protection as well, Witchers. But I'm not protecting humans here in the forest. There are enough signs at the edge of the forest that they shouldn't go further. However, people are so greedy that they think they own everything and the world must be designed so that they can live safely. They don't care how others feel about it. No monster has chosen to come into this world as a monster. I know a coexistence between humans and supernatural creatures isn't possible. That's why this forest exists. Humans have the whole world and they have Witchers like you, who take care of their habitat. Supernatural creatures have no one. But they have this forest and I ask you to respect this. I can assure you that no monster will ever leave this forest to hunt humans, but I cannot guarantee that those humans who pass the border of the forest will survive. And therefore we need a border guard that people take seriously, so they stay out of this forest," she explained.

Geralt didn't know what to think. His instinct urged him to kill both the Leshen and the Huldra immediately, but somehow it didn’t seem right to him. The Huldra was right. Who decided that everything should belong to humans? Why shouldn't monsters also have an area where they were protected? It seemed strangely logical. 

"How will you be able to ensure that the monsters won't run to the next village and cause a massacre?" Geralt wanted to know. 

He deliberately said the words out loud so that Lambert could hear them as well. 

"You have my word. And the word of a Huldra is as reliable as the rising of the sun every morning. Every monster that leaves this forest will die, just like every human who enters the forest. The only exception is Sibiletta. The Leshen needs a connection to the human world and the girl has volunteered to serve him," the Huldra explained. 

So Geralt had been right. He had immediately thought that there was something wrong with the girl. 

"Sibiletta is...is connected with the Leshen? Oh..." Lambert stammered. 

Geralt could see the horror in Lambert's face and knew immediately Lambert had made the mistake of getting involved with her. They should have killed her when they had the chance to do it! Fuck!

But on the other hand...wasn't it actually a good thing that this forest existed as a sanctuary for supernatural creatures? However, there was still the problem that the villagers could not hunt because of this. And what about children who got lost in the woods? 

"You're right. We must do something about both problems. That's why we need the guard. We were thinking of Sibiletta, but she'll need someone to help her," the Huldra said in their minds and looked at Lambert. What? Did she really think Lambert would stay here? That was crazy! Witchers were trained from an early age to roam the country and to hunt monsters, not to protect them. 

"And yet you desire nothing more than to find a home and settle down yourself, don't you? You crave to get back what was taken from you as a child - a family," the voice of the Huldra resounded in his head. 

As if there was such a thing as a home or family for his kind!

"The scars on your soul are much deeper than the scars on your skin, Witcher. That's why you can't see that you actually already have what you are looking for. You just have to let it happen. Then you'll be able to get and give what was never possible with your mother. You are allowed to love!" she continued.

Geralt shivered. He knew she was right. Deep inside, he was still the little boy who missed his mother, who was longing for love. But how? How could he have things like a family? He was a monster hunter! He couldn't settle down somewhere and start to cultivate a field. His job was to wander the streets from village to village and take orders to kill the monster of the week. There would be no home for him. 

"You forget that a home doesn't always have to be a place, Witcher. For most people it's just another person, as in your case," she said.

It was a bit annoying that she was able to read his mind. Of course Geralt's thoughts immediately moved to Jaskier. Could the bard be his home? But wasn't that too much to ask? Maybe Jaskier wanted to retire somewhere one day, but Geralt would never be able to give him that. 

"I know they trained you to stop listening to your heart, but that's exactly what you have to do. If you are not careful, one day the person who might be your home will disappear, as it has happened before. But if you realize this too late, then you won't get another chance. You are lucky that the gods gave you a second chance, there won't be a third. Use it or stay alone forever. It's your choice, Witcher."

She turned away and looked to the edge of the clearing. 

"Ah, here they come," she said, satisfied, and for the first time Geralt heard her deep voice. 

Geralt followed her gaze and froze. It was Sibiletta and Jaskier who approached them. 

Fuck no! Hadn't the Huldra just explained that humans would never leave the forest alive! Fuck! Jaskier was human!


	15. Chapter 15

The first thing Jaskier saw in the clearing was Geralt and he instantly felt himself calm down. But judging by the worried and also shocked look, Geralt wasn't at all happy to see him here. So Sibiletta had lied. Not that Jaskier didn't already know that. 

Still, not a comforting thought. What the hell was going on? Why were Geralt and Lambert just standing there with the two creatures, as if they were having a chat? Shouldn't the two Witchers have been involved in a fight by now? Something was very wrong here. Only now Jaskier had a better look at the two figures that stood with Geralt and Lambert. One of the creatures looked like a large tree stump with huge deer antlers. The other one looked like a young woman, at least from a distance. Although the situation was certainly dangerous, Jaskier was surprised to find that he was not afraid at all. He couldn't say what it was exactly because it couldn't be Geralt's reassuring presence alone. 

Jaskier had been in all sorts of dangerous situations together with the Witcher before and most of the time he was at least a little scared, even if he knew that Geralt would never let anything happen to him. But this time, he just knew he wasn't in danger. 

On the contrary! The closer he, Sibiletta, and Scary got to the others, the more precisely he could see the woman and her look was...almost respectful? What? Why was that woman looking at him as if she was about to kneel down before him? 

Scary started purring in his arms and Jaskier thought that maybe the woman looked at him like that because of his little friend. Maybe she just loved cats. Yes, this had to be the reason! And yeah, Scary was a particularly cute cat, that much was certain. 

Jaskier held the little ball of fur a little tighter and in response Scary purred even louder. When they reached the others, the two forest dwellers lowered their heads and bowed to him. 

What the hell? Why the hell should they bow to him or Scary? This was more than strange. Questioningly he looked at Geralt, who stared at him with wide eyes. What the fuck was happening here?

***

Geralt had serious trouble staying calm when he saw Jaskier coming towards them. Sibiletta was next to the bard. Geralt really didn't like the girl! Of course he knew she was only following the orders of the Leshen, but he still blamed her for putting Jaskier in danger. He should have killed her right away. Fuck!

He had to do something! He couldn't stand around and watch what the forest creatures had planned for the helpless bard. Jaskier relied on him to protect him! Geralt had to...

"Calm down, Witcher. I would never let anything happen to the Olbattan. Besides, don't you think that the Tendorm would have protected the Olbattan if he was in any danger? Otherwise Sibeletta would never have been able to bring him here," she said out loud and her voice sounded as if she was speaking to a four-year-old child. 

How the hell could Scary have been sure she wasn't going to hurt Jaskier?

"My grandmother once prophesied to me that one day I would have the honour to stand right in front of a holy Olbattan and his Tendorm. I never dared to believe that this would be true, but my grandmother was a seer. Of course she was right. You must know that there were many of these sacred creatures in the past. Now there are only a few left. Huldras can sense their existence. I remember that I cried when I felt the becoming of this Olbattan a few weeks ago," the woman explained in his head and even though he couldn't hear her tone of voice, he recognized how moved she was.

Thousands of questions swirled around in his head. Jaskier was sacred to Huldras? What the hell? He looked at the bard and for a short moment he was jealous. It was insane but he didn't like the idea that Jaskier could mean as much to someone else as he did to him. Even if he knew that this was something completely different. He really didn't like it!

"The Tendorm had to wait a long time until it finally met its master. And look how well they fit together. It's one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen, and you never were jealous of their relationship, Witcher. Why should you be jealous because your bard is holy to me?” the woman said without using her voice. Again she had read his mind.

Geralt looked at Jaskier. The bard didn't look different to him. In his fine clothes, cuddled up with the cat in his arms, Jaskier came closer and Geralt sensed a warm feeling for the other man spreading within him. He didn't know when it happened but the Huldra was right. Somehow along the long way they travelled together, Jaskier became more to him than just a companion, more than just a friend. Much more! The world wasn't whole when the bard wasn't around. Everything was grey and unimportant without him. Fuck! How did Geralt manage not to notice that...that he loved the other man, that he was in love with him? It was true. Jaskier was his family and if he was honest with himself, so was Scary. 

***

For some reason, Jaskier found it difficult to concentrate on the two forest creatures that were coming towards him. His gaze was drawn to Geralt like a magnet. Geralt stared at him with his mouth open. Something in his yellow eyes was different. 

Even if Jaskier had wanted to, he wasn't able to look away. Jaskier felt his heart start to beat faster and he had to suppress the ridiculous impulse to run to Geralt and throw himself into his strong arms. He was so in love with the other man, it wasn't funny anymore. 

No, it was stupid and ridiculous and...and hopeless and unhealthy! Even though Geralt's gaze was telling a different story right now. But that could only be an optical illusion. 

Damn! 

He wanted so much for it to be true. Why couldn't it be true?

***

When the Leshen and the Huldra met Jaskier and Sibiletta, Geralt saw for the first time that the myths about Huldras were correct. From behind the beautiful young woman looked like a tree with a fox's tail. It was incredible to see the Leshen and the Huldra bowing their heads to Jaskier and Scary in awe. Jaskier seemed to be uncomfortable. Geralt couldn't blame him. It was really weird. The poor bard certainly hadn't the slightest idea what was happening here. How could he? He didn't even believe that Scary was a Tendorm.

"Welcome to my forest, Your Holiness!" the Huldra said while she bowed and Geralt wondered why she didn't communicate telepathically with Jaskier like she did with him and surely also with Lambert. 

"I would never presume to enter the mind of an Olbattan without asking permission!” he immediately received the telepathic response.

Yes, that made sense in a very odd way. However, it was more than strange that anyone should consider the bard as holy. This was Jaskier to whom she now stood bowing her head. His bard! The man who had given him sleepless nights and wet dreams for several weeks. 

By all the Gods, it was more than embarrassing that she could read his mind. Especially when his thoughts were in danger of drifting towards dangerous and not very innocent realms. But he could not really do anything about it even if he wanted to.

***

"Your Holiness?"

Jaskier looked at the woman in astonishment. Did she talk to him?

"I know that you certainly don't know the old myths, but for us Huldras, Olbattan have always been sacred. After all, the bite of your companion is the only thing that can heal us,” the Huldra explained and Jaskier was even more confused than before.

"I don't understand! What is an Olbattan? And who should bite you and why for heaven's sake should anyone bite you? I don't understand one word," Jaskier said. 

Finally both the woman and the Leshen raised their heads to look at him.

"You are an Olbattan. And your companion's bite can heal me. However, your companion will only do it if you tell her to do so,” she said, looking at him hopefully.

"You want me to tell my cat to bite you?" Jaskier asked incredulously, noticing that his voice squeaked slightly.

But seriously? That was ridiculous! How did she get the crazy idea that he was an Obla…whatever she called it, and why on earth would she want Scary to bite her? Not to mention that he couldn't command things like that to the cat at all. By all means, this poor woman must be crazy!

"You don't believe me," she remarked resignedly. "May I show you, Your Highness?"

Jaskier still had no idea what she was talking about, so he just shrugged. Why not?

"Okay?"

He knew it sounded more like a question than an answer but what did she expect? That he would take her seriously?

The woman nodded gravely and muttered something to the Leshen. Then everything happened very fast.

  
  


***

Everything happened so fast Geralt had no time to react. One moment he was still surprised that Jaskier was apparently sacred to the woman, and the next the Leshen had reached for the bard with his long root fingers and threw him in a high arc across the clearing. The force was so strong that Jaskier would surely crash into the trees at the edge of the clearing. No one could survive that. And within a split second, Geralt knew that neither he nor the Tendorm would be fast enough to catch him. 

"Nooo! Please nooo!" he cried, but he knew it was too late.

***


	16. Chapter 16

Geralt wanted to look away, but he couldn't. Powerless, he just stood there and watched Jaskier flying towards the trees. In a few moments, he would see Jaskier's body shattered against the solid tree trunks and he wouldn't get a chance to tell the bard that he returned his feelings... 

*** 

It felt unreal to fly over the clearing as if he was a bird. The silhouettes of the others moved further and further away and he knew that he would probably fall down like a stone after crashing into the trees very soon. And yet, Jaskier felt no fear. It was as if he knew that nothing would happen to him, almost as if he was invulnerable. But of course that was absurd. In a few moments he would know how vulnerable he was. He could have closed his eyes, but he didn't want to miss one of the last moments he would be able to look at the love of his life. Geralt just stood there, the shock was clearly written on his face. Jaskier was incredibly happy that he had confessed his love to the Witcher. Even if he knew that Geralt would never return his feelings, it was comforting to know that the other man at least knew that there was someone who loved him. Even though Geralt had certainly never lacked sexual partners, Jaskier was sure that he was not exactly showered with love. And Geralt deserved every bit of love he could get.

It was strange how relatively time passed. A few seconds could pass like the blink of an eye, but now to him they seemed to be eternal. He had enough time to observe the figures in the clearing. He saw Lambert running after him, he saw Scary, who he had just held in his arms. Jaskier must have let go of her reflexively when the Leshen grabbed him. Somehow he knew that Geralt would take care of the cat if Jaskier didn't exist anymore. Even if he always pretended he didn't like cats, Jaskier had long since noticed that the two got along very well. Yeah, sometimes he was even sure that they liked each other. A friendship between a Witcher and a cat was certainly something extraordinary and Jaskier was a bit proud that he was the reason for this rare connection. 

When Jaskier was sure that he was going to crash into the trees any moment, one of the craziest things Jaskier had ever seen happened. Below him in the meadow Scary changed her shape and mutated into a huge beautiful black panther. 

Bloody hell! It was incredible! 

Geralt had been right. He hadn't lied to Jaskier! Scary wasn't just a cat but a Tendorm! 

And that probably made him an Olbattan, just like the woman had said. Not that this knowledge would be of much use to him, because in a few moments it would all be over. Shouldn't he have hit the trees by now? Only now did he notice that he was no longer moving at all. 

He...he was just hanging in the air! 

What the fuck? 

How was this even possible? The last time he checked he didn't have the ability to float in the air.

And then Scary, or rather the panther emitted a high loud sound and the world around Jaskier was suddenly standing still. He was hanging helplessly in the air. HE WAS HANGING IN THE AIR!

Scary ran in his direction. Fascinated, Jaskier watched how smoothly the big graceful cat moved. Then she jumped up to him seemingly effortlessly and grabbed him gently between her teeth. 

Although the rest of the world still seemed to stand still, the panther pulled him down so Jaskier didn't smash against the trees, but landed on the meadow without a single scratch. 

Scary, still in panther form, stood beside him, licked his face and purred. The panther fucking purred!

It should have been disgusting, but somehow it just had a calming effect on him. It was like Scary wanted to make sure that nothing had happened to him. His heart warmed at the thought of how much she cared for him. 

*** 

One second Geralt was waiting for the inevitable impact and the next Jaskier was laying in the meadow while the Tendorm licked his face with her huge tongue. If Geralt wasn't still motionless because of the shock, he would surely have kneeled down in relief. 

Scary had saved Jaskier! Although that should be impossible! 

If he didn't already secretly love the cat, then this would be the right time to change his mind.

Only now did Geralt notice that all the others were moving slowly in Jaskier's direction. 

He was the only one who still was frozen to the ground trying to process what just happened. 

And then it hit him! He wouldn't lose Jaskier and he also had the opportunity to confess his feelings to the bard. At that thought, Geralt's heart started pounding like crazy. 

"Tendorms are able to manipulate time when their masters are in danger. Your bard wasn't in danger. I've explained to you that the Olbattan is sacred to me. Do you really think I would have let him get hurt?" she said in his head. 

"Could have fooled me for a moment," he answered grumpily. 

Even if she knew that Jaskier was in no danger,  _ he  _ didn't know that. Fuck it! He almost had a heart attack. 

"Your bard will have a long and happy life if the people who are important to him don't act too stupid," he heard her speaking in his head. 

"Long life? Maybe for a human..." Geralt hissed and Lambert turned to him looking confused. 

Their different lifespan was something Geralt didn't like to think about. It scared him. Falling in love with humans had the unpleasant side effect of slowly watching them die. They aged a lot faster than Witchers. But at least Geralt would be able to spend a few happy years with the bard if everything went well. Even if the pain of losing Jaskier would kill him when the bard's time was over. 

"Didn't they teach you anything at your School of the Wolf, Witcher? Of course an Olbattan lives as long as his Tendorm," she explained.

"WHAT?" Gerald yelled. 

"Oh, come on, guys! Listening to scraps of your conversation is exhausting. Either you talk telepathically or not. But this mixture is just frustrating," Lambert complained. 

Geralt had no time to reply because the news the Huldra had just told him was... breathtaking... surprising... amazing. 

Jaskier wouldn't die long before Geralt. They could grow old together! In the meantime, they reached Jaskier and Scary. The Tendorm had regained her cat form and purred contentedly in Jaskier's arms. Geralt had to suppress the urge to take the animal and cuddle it to death. Not that he would do such a thing. Witchers didn’t do cuddling! At least not in public But this wasn't the time to show his affection for the cat anyway, even if Geralt was extremely grateful that she had saved his bard. 

Jaskier still looked completely overwhelmed and looked at Geralt in disbelief. 

"You told the truth. I can't believe that Scary is really a Tendorm! This is the craziest and most amazing thing that's ever happened to me," the bard said with a wide grin on his face. 

"Imagine never having to babysit my sorry ass again, Geralt. Isn't that amazing?" Jaskier cheered.

Geralt didn't think it was amazing at all. He didn't want Jaskier not to need him anymore. 

"Don't be silly, Witcher. We both know that the bard will still need you in his life. He just doesn't need a bodyguard anymore," the voice of the Huldra resounded in his head and even if Geralt would never admit it, he took comfort in her appeasing words.

"What did you want from me earlier?" Jaskier asked, addressing the Huldra. "You said something about Scary biting you and then you'd be cured. What did you mean?"

"Oh your Holiness! You would really consider curing me?" the woman cried in relief and knelt on the floor with Jaskier. Tears were streaming down her cheeks. 

"Sure. If I can help you and Scary goes along with it. Why not?" Jaskier replied in a good mood. 

As if on command, Scary jumped out of Jaskier's arms and turned back into a panther. With big expectant eyes, the Huldra stretched out her arm towards the animal. Without hesitation, Scary bit down carefully. Just enough to make her bleed. Suddenly she fell to the ground and started to shiver. Then Geralt saw that the woman's back changed. More and more of her tree back turned into a human form. The fox's tail disappeared, and finally the spell seemed to be finished and the Huldra looked like a young woman even from behind. 

Happily she beamed at Jaskier, tears were still running down her cheeks. 

"Your Holiness, I will never forget this. Thank you so much!" she whispered. 

"Oh, no problem. Anytime. Well, I... if there's nothing else, maybe we could leave..." Jaskier stammered. 

*** 

It was nice to make someone happy. If only everything could be that easy. When the woman got up from the ground, Jaskier also stood up and knocked the grass off his clothes. Scary changed back again and if Jaskier hadn't known better, he would have thought that she looked very smug. 

"I would like to give you a gift, Your Holiness. Something to show how grateful I am that you have deemed me worthy enough to rescue me. Actually, it's three presents. But for the third, I would have to enter your thoughts and I would never do that without your permission. I swear that I only will tell you something and that I will not read your thoughts," the woman said and bowed to him again. Somehow this constant bowing and talking about his supposed holiness irritated him. But whatever. 

"Okay," he said. 

It would certainly be rude to refuse her to give him a gift. 

"It's an honour," she said, snapping her fingers. 

Immediately afterwards at least twenty wolves appeared at the edge of the clearing. In their midst were two women. One of the women Jaskier recognized immediately and his heart sank. 

It was Yennefer!

The other was a girl with white-blonde hair and Jaskier guessed from Geralt's reaction that she had to be the child of surprise. 

Oh! What did the Huldra want to tell him with this gift? That it was now time for him to leave Geralt? 

Shit! He wasn't ready! 

"Only you can make the man of your heart happy because his greatest wish is to have a family. Look for the signs, Your Holiness!" he suddenly heard a voice in his head.

Jaskier didn't know what to do with the cryptic information, but what did he expect? An instruction how he could create a love poison to make Geralt fall in love with him? Yeah, that would have been nice, but unfortunately it was impossible. 

And now that Geralt had the woman he loved and the girl he was looking for back in his life, it was even more unlikely. 

Fuck, he knew it would hurt if he had to leave Geralt. But somehow he was stupid enough to not realize how bad it would hurt. And it was quite incomprehensible why he was not prepared for it. He had experienced this before. Unfortunately this time it was much worse.

>Watch the signs!<, she had said. 

It was impossible not to notice the signs!

"My gift is this advice and the freedom of these two women. You can leave the forest now, Your Holiness. However, you will have to continue your journey without your friend, for he has agreed to stay here with Sibiletta and guard the border of the forest," the Huldra explained. 

Everyone looked at Lambert in surprise. 

"You want to stay here? Willingly?" Jaskier couldn't believe it. 

Lambert laughed. 

"Yeah willingly! There comes a time for êvery Witcher to settle down," Lambert said and shrugged his shoulders. 

Sibiletta took his hand and Jaskier had to confess that they made a cute couple. He was happy for Lambert. At least there would be a happy ending for Lambert and also for Geralt, just not for him. 

***


	17. Chapter 17

" _Don't let too much time pass before you confess your feelings, Witcher,"_ were the last admonishing words the Huldra spoke in Geralt's head.

He didn't intend to wait to confess his feelings to Jaskier, but it was almost impossible to talk to the bard alone for even one moment. There was never an opportunity to talk to him alone. Most of the time one of the two women rode along side of him. Jaskier always refused to ride on horseback because he claimed that he was used to walking for hours. 

It was depressing! 

Now that Geralt had finally admitted his feelings for the bard to himself, he couldn't wait to let them out. Even if he was also afraid of confessing to the bard. What if the other man had changed his mind? 

Perhaps the bard had come to terms with the situation and only saw Geralt as a friend now. Maybe it was already too late! 

Fuck! Maybe he destroyed his only hope of happiness because he wasn't aware of his own feelings!

Goddammit! He had to stop! There was no point in wearing himself out. Tomorrow he would have the opportunity to talk with the bard. They would arrive in a small village near the point where all four borders of Kaedwen, Aedirn, Redania and Temeria met. There Geralt hoped to share a room with Jaskier at the local inn and finally he could talk about his feelings with Jaskier. Geralt would survive that one night, even if he was getting impatient. At least he hoped he would be able to wait until the next day because it was getting more and more difficult for him not to shout his feelings out loud. Jaskier had become very quiet in the last few days and Geralt almost went crazy because he didn't know why.

***

"We still have dried meat, dried plums, and flatbread," Yennefer said and put the food on the small table in front of the only window of the small room.

Ciri pushed the three chairs, which were scattered around the room, to the table, which she had previously freed from the finger-thick layer of dust. There was a fourth chair, but it was broken. And that was the moment when Jaskier knew what to do.

_"Read the signs, your holiness_!" the Huldra had once again whispered in his ear when she said goodbye.

And of course! He knew what was about to happen as soon as Yennefer and Ciri appeared in the clearing. He understood that his journey with Geralt had come to an end. From now on he would have to travel without the Witcher.

Of course he saw the signs now quite clearly. He wasn't blind! One table, three chairs...

How could that be misinterpreted? She had said that Geralt wanted nothing more than a family, and that is exactly what he now had in Yennefer and Ciri. 

That was exactly what his friend wanted when he got so angry at the mountain that he had sent Jaskier away. 

And now Jaskier was the only thing that kept the Witcher from re-entering a relationship with Yennefer. After all, the Witcher had promised Jaskier not to have sex in front of him, so to say. 

However, the Witcher certainly hadn't reckoned at that time that he still had a chance with the beautiful witch. And because of the girl, Yennefer also got what she always wanted. Ciri wasn't her biological daughter, but Yennefer and Geralt were able to take care of the girl as if she were their own child. It was perfect! 

Now Jaskier was the only thing that stood in the way of Geralt's happiness. 

Jaskier was sure that's what the Huldra meant when she said: " _Only you can make the man of your heart happy because his greatest wish is to have a family. Look for the signs, Your Holiness!"_

Yes, the signs were crystal clear! 

Jaskier had to leave Geralt! And it had to be tonight and it had to be forever! Jaskier would ask Scary to make sure that their paths never crossed again. This was the only way the bard could be sure that Geralt would be happy with his new family. He shouldn't be bothered by Jaskier’s feelings. Geralt had to forget about Jaskier's existence! Even if the thought of never meeting the Witcher again tore the bard's heart in a thousand pieces. But Geralt's happiness was more important to him than his own. 

And in the end, that was what love was all about, wasn't it? 

To make the other person happy, no matter how you feel yourself. Somewhere Jaskier had once heard that true love was selfless. If he was honest he'd never quite understood that sentence. At least until now, because now he knew exactly what it meant.

***

After Geralt had found Ciri with the help of the Huldra much faster than he thought, there was no need to move further north. It quickly became evident that Ciri was a very powerful young girl. Geralt was able to train her to be a Witcher (without the trial of the grass, of course!) but that would never be enough. His magical abilities were very limited. Even Yennefer wouldn't be up to the task. So they decided to seek Nenneke's help. Geralt hoped that Ciri could be trained at the Temple of Melitele for schooling until she had her powers under control. After that, he would train her in all the martial arts a Witcher had to offer. That was the reason why they were now heading west. On the way to Ellander they had found an abandoned hermit's house and decided to spend the night there.

It was not as comfortable as sleeping in a bed, but it was better than nothing. They even managed to light a fire, so they had warmth for the first time in days.

Ciri had wiped the little table in the corner. Then she had gathered all the chairs in the room and Yennefer had unpacked the rest of their food. It was...somehow domestic. Not that Geralt had much experience with such things.

Anyway, it was more comfortable than anything they had in the last few days when they could only sleep on bare forest floors. But Geralt still couldn't wait until they finally arrived in Drinde and would sleep in an inn. However, this had less to do with the prospect of a comfortable bed than with the fact that he could finally talk to Jaskier.

***

Geralt, Ciri and Yennefer were so busy preparing everything for the night and making plans for the future that they didn't even notice that Jaskeir took his grey coat and his bag. Scary looked at him in surprise but followed him without protesting when he quietly left the little hut. 

When he turned around and looked through the small window from the outside, he saw Geralt sitting at the table with the two women. The Witcher seemed so happy and relaxed. Jaskier had never seen him like this before. He wanted to remember his friend and the love of his life like this. He would save this memory of Geralt's laughing face forever in this heart! 

Even more so, because Jaskier knew that there would be times when he would have to remind himself that he had done the right thing.

That it was good and necessary to leave without saying goodbye. Because he had no other choice. Jaskier knew he would break down if he had to say goodbye to Geralt face to face. The last time he left the Witcher they were both angry, but this time it was different. This time he was happy that Geralt had found what he had always been looking for and also he was so damn heartbroken, he never imagined it would hurt so much. This time it was final and therefore it was almost impossible to endure. Sighing heavily, he snuggled Scary to his chest and sneaked off into the dark night.

***

"Do you think Nenneke will help me?" Ciri wanted to know when they were sitting around the table together.

"She is a good friend of both me and Geralt. So I think she'll help you," Yennefer replied nodding her head.

"Don't worry, Ciri. If she refuses, we'll come up with something else," Geralt said in a calming voice.

Ciri laughed.

"We are a funny group. A witch, a Witcher, an Olbattan, and a princess who first has to learn to control her powers," she said amused. But suddenly her face became serious.

"By the way...where is Jaskier?" she wanted to know and looked around the little hut.

Geralt immediately felt panic rise in his chest. He looked around the room like a hunted animal.

Not only Jaskier had disappeared, but also his grey wool coat, the bag, and also Scary were gone.

FUCK!

Geralt's heart was racing. Terrified he remembered the words of the Huldra:

 _“If you are not careful, one day the person who might be your home will disappear, as it has happened before. But if you realize this too late, then you won't get another chance_.”

Oh God! He fucked up! Again! Like the Huldra told him. Geralt had waited too long and now he had missed his chance. He had driven Jaskier away again. This time it would be forever.

"He can't be far. A few minutes ago he was still standing over there," Yennefer said, pointing to the other end of the room.

"If you hurry up you might catch up with him," Ciri suggested and Yennefer nodded.

"Even if he's an Olbattan. Maybe you have a chance," she said, looking sadly at Geralt.

Geralt refused to believe it was too late. No matter what the Huldra had said, he had found Jaskier once before, and he would find him again. Even if he would have to search for the rest of his life.

Without another word, he ran into the night. He could only hope that he had taken the right path and that Jaskeir hadn't gone the other way.

"Geralt! Geralt! You forgot your swords...Geralt!" Yennefer called after him, but he had no time to turn back.

No matter what creatures lurked in the dark, nothing was worse than losing Jaskier. So he kept running...

***


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, we are nearly done. I hope you enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, we are nearly done. I hope you enjoy!

It was already dark, only the moonlight lit up the night. Jaskier stumbled over roots and stones with almost every step. Not that he would have seen more if it had been the day. No, his vision was veiled by all the tears that wouldn't stop running over his cheeks. Jaskier decided not to stay on the street. It was possible that Geralt would be looking for him there. That is, if he noticed his absence. As happy and content as the Witcher had seemed when Jaskier had looked through the window of the little hut, the bard wasn't sure whether he would notice quickly. However, if he noticed Jaskier's absence, Geralt would certainly not let the bard sneak away without at least trying to say goodbye to him.

But Jaskier couldn't look Geralt in the eye and then disappear from his life forever. Oh God, that would be more than he could bear. So he sniffed quietly and continued to stumble over all the roots. 

As if she felt how sad Jaskier was, Scary meowed and rubbed her head against his chest. He was so happy that he had at least the cat. The last time he left Geralt he was completely alone. This time he had a friend, someone who would protect and comfort him! 

Still, he had to ask her to be quiet if he didn't want to risk Geralt hearing them. 

"Psst! We need to be as quiet as possible now, Scary. Geralt's senses are very strong. He'd hear you even if he is far away. Please help me and do what's best for me. We both know I wouldn't survive to see Geralt now," Jaskier whispered in her ear.

Now that he knew that Scary was a Tendorm, he was certain that she would always help him. It was her decision to accept him as her Olbattan, so she would protect him until the end of her life. Therefore, it wasn't surprising that the cat lay quietly in his arms from then on. Only once in a while her ears turned as if she heard something. It was probably just some animal, Jaskier thought without further attention. 

After some time however, she became restless and wanted to be put on the ground. Since there was always the possibility that there were monsters in the forest, Jaskier, of course, put her down. Maybe she wanted to be ready to change and guard him. 

By all the Gods, it was reassuring to have a companion like Scary. Otherwise, it would probably have been more than stupid to walk alone into the forest in the middle of the night.

But with Scary by his side, he knew he had nothing to fear. So he didn't think about it any more and went on until Scary stopped and actually transformed into a panther. 

Jaskier looked around, but he couldn't see any monsters in the dark. However, this was certainly due to his poorly developed senses, because there had to be something. Otherwise Scary wouldn't have turned. Since the panther still didn't move, Jaskier also stopped and at least tried to listen when he wasn't able to see anything. But nothing! At least nothing out of the ordinary. He heard, of course, the typical sounds of the night like screeching owls hunting prey, or the cracking of branches of all the night-active animals crawling through the undergrowth. But even though the sounds were a bit scary, none of them sounded threatening. But of course Jaskier knew that his dull human senses couldn't be trusted. If Scary had turned, then some danger had to lurk in the dark.

***

Geralt ran as fast as he could. In between, he stopped again and again to listen. But it was like the proverbial needle in the haystack. How the hell could he find the bard? Geralt was on the road through the forest, but what if Jaskier was avoiding the road? After all, the bard hadn't said goodbye. So maybe he didn't want to be found. Geralt tried to banish the idea that Jaskier would be forever untraceable to him. 

Completely desperate, he stopped again and tried to focus all his senses on finding Jaskier.

He promised to himself and to all the gods he didn't really believe in that he would never again make the mistake of keeping his feelings to himself, if only they would help him one more time. Just this one more time.

And that's when he felt it. As if the gods were truly giving him a sign, he sensed a slight trembling of power. A fine vibration that he had felt twice in his life, both times when Scary had turned into a panther! This could only mean that Jaskier was either in danger or... or... but could that be possible? 

The other explanation Geralt came up with spontaneously was that Scary wanted to draw attention to herself. That she wanted Geralt to find her. Maybe she heard him. Geralt hadn't bothered to run silently through the forest, so perhaps the Tendorm knew that Geralt could feel her transformation. But no matter why Scary had turned, Geralt now knew where Jaskier was and he would be damned if he wouldn't take the chance to track him now.

***

Scary just stood there and didn't move. It almost seemed like she was waiting. But what was she waiting for? Jaskier expected that at any moment a monster would appear between the trees and attack them. So he had no choice but to stand still and wait and see what would happen. After some time however, the bard had to admit that he became restless. He knew that Scary would protect him. But still! Jaskier didn't even know which direction the monster was coming from. Not to mention that he had no clue what it was. Maybe it would be wolves? However he did not hear any howling. Or it would be Tree Creatures? Or a Leshen? 

“Oh no! Please no Leshen again,” he thought. 

When, after what felt like an eternity, he suddenly heard a rustle, he wondered why Scary did nothing. She just stood there listening. Shouldn't she attack whatever was about to come closer? Surely she had heard the sound long before Jaskier. It was weird. But Jaskier knew he could rely on her. There must be a good reason why she hadn't attacked the monster yet. 

And then the figure suddenly appeared in front of them and Jaskier recognized with horror who it was. 

"Geralt!" Jaskier whispered in dismay. 

Fuck! He would have preferred a Leshen or wolves! That was exactly what he wanted to prevent. Now he would have to say goodbye to the Witcher after all. 

Goddammit! 

He wouldn't survive this! 

He had little time to wonder why Scary let this happen until Geralt reached him.

Jaskier immediately noticed that Geralt didn't have his swords with him. What the hell? Did Geralt actually run off looking for him without his weapons? Somehow the thought touched him. It showed that Geralt at least cared for him. Yeah, he knew the thought was unfair. 

Of course Geralt cared about him. The Witcher had told him several times that he considered him his best friend. It wasn't Geralt's fault that Jaskier wanted more. 

"Fuck, Jaskier! You can't just leave. I fucking thought I'd never see you again!" Gerald cursed and came even closer. 

His yellow eyes shone in the moonlight and Jaskier wasn't sure if they looked upset or relieved. Probably both. 

"That was my intention" Jaskier confessed and looked down. 

Fuck! Did Geralt have to make it so hard for him? 

"What's that supposed to mean? Why do you want to leave me? Jaskier, I don't understand. What did I do wrong this time?" Geralt murmured and Jaskier could hear how hurt his friend was. 

"You don't understand why I had to leave? Can't you imagine?" Jaskier wanted to know desperately. 

Geralt just shook his head and looked so helpless that Jaskeir almost believed that the Witcher really had no clue what this was about. 

Oh by all the Gods! Was Geralt serious? Did he really want Jaskier to say it?

A frustrated groan reverberated in Jaskier’s throat. Fuck!

The bard once again took a deep breath to internally prepare himself for the embarrassment that the explanation would bring. But it had to be. The sooner they settled this, the sooner he got out of here and could start his new life. His new life without the Witcher. God, this hurt so much! 

"I couldn't stand it! The Huldra told me that, more than anything, you want a family, Geralt. And now you have just that. According to the Huldra, I'm the one that stands in the way of your happiness. So of course I left. Did you expect me to go with you and just watch, or that I would stay and stand in the way of your happiness? You know how I feel about you!" Jaskier said and looked straight at Geralt. 

The Witcher looked at him without understanding. 

"What the hell are you talking about? Why should you stand in the way of my happiness?" he asked, looking confused.

Jaskier sighed and closed his eyes. This was even harder than he had imagined. 

"Geralt, I know you love Yennefer. You must be overjoyed to have her back. With her and Ciri, you'd finally have your family. But you promised me you wouldn't touch her while I was there. And I know you, Geralt. I know you'd keep your word. That's why I left. I want you to be happy. And... and I couldn't bear to see you and her together, " Jaskier whispered with a hoarse voice.

Geralt stared at him for a long time. Then he cleared his throat. Jaskier couldn't really see it under the moonlight, but he almost had the impression that the other man was embarrassed. Nervously he stepped from one foot to the other and looked to the ground. Then he raised his head and glanced at Jaskier. 

"Jaskier, I love you," he said seriously.

For fuck's sake! Did Geralt really have to make it so hard for him? 

"I know you love me, Geralt. And I know it's selfish of me that this friendly love is not enough for me, but..."

But Jaskier didn’t have a chance to finish the sentence because Geralt came closer and took his face in both hands. The other man was so close, Jaskier didn't know how to breathe any more. 

"I don't love you like a friend. I love you!" he almost yelled. "In a romantic way! I am in love with you! You're my family, you idiot! You and Scary. Yeah, I thought I'd love Yennefer back then. But fuck, I was so wrong. It's you, it's always been you! I was just too stupid to realize. And when I finally did, all of a sudden Yennefer and Ciri were there and I never had a chance to confess my feelings to you. I was hoping we'd share a room at the inn tomorrow and I could finally talk to you alone..."

Jaskier swallowed loudly and licked his lips. 

“What…”

Oh, fuck! Jaskier had crashed into the trees and died. Scary wasn't a Tendorm. She hadn't saved him. The Huldra had killed him, and now he was in heaven. This was the reason why he was hallucinating now. There was no other explanation because this was a love confession for fuck's sake! A love confession from Geralt! This was all Jaskier ever wanted and it was too good to be true. 

Goddammit, why couldn't this be true? 

But it felt so real. Why did he feel Geralt's breath ghosting over his skin and his fingers caressing his cheeks tenderly? 

"Fuck, Jaskier! Don't look at me like this. You're not dreaming. I love you! And I'm asking you to stay. Please... please don't leave me!" Geralt whispered blinking at him with glazed eyes, looking tousled and in awe at the same time.

Jaskier swallowed. Could it be true? Oh God, please let this be real, Jaskier thought and then Geralt surged forward and swallowed all of his doubts with a haphazard kiss. 

And all of a sudden Jaskier didn't care if this was real or not. As long as Geralt didn't stop kissing him he didn't care. 

***

Jaskier froze at first when Geralt kissed him, and he knew he had to give his friend time, so he backed off a bit to look the other man in the eye. But he never let go of the bard's face. Not for a single moment. Tears ran over Jaskier's cheeks and Geralt wiped them away gently with his thumbs. 

“Wow,” Jaskier breathed as he brought his hands up to fist in Geralt’s hair.

And then the bard was surging forward to kiss Geralt again. The thought that the bard would never have known how much Geralt loved him almost was too much. 

"I'm such a fucking idiot and I am so sorry, Jaskier," Geralt said, kissing Jaskier again and again. First the tip of the nose, then his cheeks and finally his soft lips. 

Geralt's heart ached with fondness and so much love for the other man.

Why the hell did it take him so long to understand that Jaskier was the fate the golden dragon had mentioned on the mountain? It was Jaskier without whom he wouldn't survive, from whom he never wanted to part. Jaskier was his family! Just like the Huldra had said. It was so obvious! Even Lambert and Sibiletta had noticed!

Only he was too blind to see it and it almost took him too long to admit it. As if to scare away the thought that he had lost the bard by a hair forever, he drew the other man even closer and began to split his lips with his tongue. 

Moaning, Jaskier allowed Geralt's tongue in. 

In his past life, Geralt wasn't really fond of kissing. Kisses were nice, sure, but not necessarily important in his eyes. 

But boy was he wrong. Kisses with Jaskier were something completely different. They made his heart beat faster and his toes curl. 

Geralt put all the love he felt into the kiss, and Jaskier clung to Geralt's shoulders as if his life depended on it. And when the bard returned the kiss with passion it took Geralt's breath away.

How the hell had he not noticed how much he wanted Jaskier? Geralt had had more than enough sex in his long life. Mostly with women. Often with women he didn't even know. And rarely, as with Yennefer, it was with someone he thought he loved. But he had never felt anything in his life that was even remotely similar to what he now felt when Jaskier made these soft, low noises. It drove Geralt crazy. And he knew that for sure he sounded equally wrecked. 

Geralt knew deep in the back of his mind that right now they would be easy prey for every monster since all his senses were focused on Jaskier, but Geralt was sure that Scary would look after them. And even if he wanted to, all he could focus on was Jaskier. It was overwhelming to feel the bard's body pressed against his. 

And this was just a kiss! 

A wonderful perfect kiss full of passion, tenderness, relief, and insight, though. 

  
  
  



	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please notice, that I changed the rating from Mature to Explicit, because this chapter is very smut!!! ^^

Yennefer's facial expression as he and Geralt came back hand in hand was priceless. The otherwise always calm looking witch was hardly able to hide her shock. Ciri was also surprised at first, but after only a few moments she beamed. 

"Wow, why didn't I see this coming?" Yennefer asked and shook her head.

"You always manage to surprise me."

"However, in retrospect, it makes sense," Ciri added with a grin. 

"Yes, you're right. It really does," Yennefer thoughtfully agreed, and Jaskier wondered what she meant by that. 

But like hell, he would ask.

And that was that. 

There were no more reactions to the new changes in Geralt's and Jaskier's relationship status. Both of the girls acted as if it was the most natural thing in the world that Geralt and he were a couple now. Jaskier was truly surprised. Surprised and relieved! He was a bit scared that Yennefer would be mad at him. After all, she and Geralt were lovers once. But she seemed to be okay with it. She wasn't happy about it like Ciri but she was okay with it. 

Jaskier would never have insisted on telling Yennefer and Ciri the truth right away. Especially not Yennefer. But Geralt didn't have the patience for secrecy. 

"Don't you think they'd know when you fall asleep in my arms tonight? The cabin has only one room. They'll notice when we cuddle up together in a corner even when it's dark. And don't even think about wanting to sleep apart from me. I've wasted enough time. I nearly lost you. From now on, you will sleep in my arms every night, whether on a forest floor or in a real bed," Geralt declared and reached for Jaskier's hand. " Unless... except of course... you don't want to..." he quickly added and looked at Jaskier insecurely.

Jaskier almost laughed out loud. Not only because of Geralt's absurd assumption that Jaskier wouldn't want to sleep in his arms every night (by the gods, he would die as a happy man if he could do just that!), but also because the Witcher was so atypically romantic and at the same time seemed so insecure. If Jaskier wouldn't have been already so gone on the man, he would have fallen for him right then and there. 

Geralt was ridiculously cute and that for sure wasn't a term one would usually associate with a Witcher. 

Then they were going back to the cabin, holding hands and it was the most unexpected and wonderful walk through a forest Jaskier ever made. Scary, retransformed as a cat, was sitting purring on Geralt's shoulders. She seemed very happy with herself and the world. And for the love of all the gods, she had every right to be pleased with her actions. By a fraction of an inch, Jaskier would have had to live a life without Geralt. He didn't even want to think about it.

When it was time for them to lie down and sleep, Jaskier initially worried that he wouldn't be able to fall asleep surrounded by Geralt's body heat and feeling his body so close. They had only kissed in the woods, but everything in Jaskier was screaming for more. But in the presence of Yennefer, Ciri and Scary, there would be no opportunity for more. So they had to wait until the next day when they would finally have their own room in the inn. But as Geralt stretched Jaskier's cloak over them both and took him in his arms, Jaskier felt extremely secure and so he fell asleep peacefully within a few moments, despite all his fears.

***

"I'm happy for you," Ciri said, and Geralt knew she really meant it.

"Hm," he grumbled, embarrassed. 

"I think we need another horse," she said matter of factly. 

"Why do we need another horse?" 

Sometimes he really didn't get her. Her thoughts sometimes had the habit of jumping around like a young goat. 

"Come on. I know you'd much rather have Jaskier sitting here with you, but you're both way too polite to let us girls walk all the way. That's why we need another horse, one for me and Yennefer, so you can ride together with Jaskier," she explained. 

And true, she was right. They really needed another horse. Geralt was surprised how little he liked that Jaskier was so far away from him walking on the other side of the street next to Yennefer. 

"Yeah. We do need another horse," he agreed. 

"You know, first I thought you were interested in Yennefer. But Jaskier makes so much more sense," Ciri declared. "I haven't known you for a very long time, but I've noticed that you don't easily trust. I think there are very few people who know the real you. Sometimes I even have the feeling that there is only one person who really knows you and not just as the Witcher, the monster killer. And this person is Jaskier. You act differently around him. As if you aren't on alert with him. I think you are putting on a show for me, for Yennefer, for everyone except him. He is the only one you let know that you're tired, or hungry and stuff like that. And if he doesn't pay attention, you always look at him like he's holding your whole future in his hands. And I guess that's just how it is for you. He is your future. He looks at you the same way, by the way. It's kinda cute," she explained. "Besides, you're the only one who can make him shut up only by looking at him. If that's not impressive, then what is?" she added with a smile on her face. 

Wow! How did she realize all these things in only a few days? That was scary!

"Hm," Geralt just answered, overwhelmed. 

What else was he supposed to answer? 

"Somehow you are like a small family, you, the cat and the bard. And now you've adopted me too," she pondered. 

Her words made him feel warm inside because that was exactly the point! He had a family! And the fact that Ciri said it out loud made it much more real. 

***

When they finally arrived at the inn in the evening, Jaskier was almost starving and, if he was honest, he was also exhausted. But hey, he had to walk the whole distance by foot. The girls were riding on the horse with Geralt alternately. 

For a brief moment, Jaskier felt a pang of jealousy when he saw Yennefer with Geralt on Roach, but he swallowed it down. Geralt had said that he loved him. He had to trust him.

After an excellent meal and a hot bath, Jaskier lay down on the heavenly soft bed to rest a little. Geralt had to leave to deal with some business and Jaskier waited impatiently for his return. However, he must have fallen asleep after a while, because when Geralt woke him up the moon was already very high and Geralt smelled like soap and his hair was wet from a bath. 

Besides.... he was completely naked and... clearly in the mood.  Jaskier swallowed heavily as he let his gaze wander over Geralt's body which was covered in scars.

Fuck! He wanted the other man so much, he didn't even know where to start touching him. With trembling fingers, he caressed Geralt's hard chest down to his flat stomach. Geralt shuddered underneath his touch. Jaskier was a bit surprised that the other man's skin was so soft, even if his muscles were hard as steel and there were scars everywhere. 

"You're wearing way too many clothes. Why the fuck are you still wearing clothes?" Geralt rasped.

Impatiently he tried to help Jaskier to slip out of his pants and the tunic. It was a miracle that the garments were not torn because the Witcher tugged so hard at the fabric. But Jaskeir couldn't have cared less!

When they were both finally naked, Jaskier just couldn't hold back any longer. Greedily, he drew the other man closer to kiss him hard. His hands clung into Geralt's hair. Enthusiastic, Geralt returned the kiss and danced his fingertips over the skin on Jaskier's back. 

Goddammit! This felt so good. Jaskier was fully hard now. He was about to explode and they hadn't even started yet!

“ _ Jaskier _ ,” Geralt groaned and fucking hell, the other man sounded as wrecked as Jaskier felt.

Geralt’s face was flushed, his eyelids heavy, and his breaths came unevenly. 

Jaskier had never seen the Witcher this intense and voracious. The sight was breathtaking.

“Geralt…” Jaskier groaned.

This was Geralt who looked at him so hungry and who was painfully hard because of Jaskier! The thought took his breath away.

For a short moment, he feared that this was just a dream. But then Geralt leaned in and started to leave tiny soft kisses from Jaskeirs ear to his collarbone. The bard shuddered. He didn't know how many times he had imagined having sex with the Witcher, but in none of his daydreams had the other man been so tender. This was so much better than his fantasies! So so much better!

A needy whine escaped his throat when Geralt kissed him again. This was the moment when Jaskier’s brain lost all his high functions.

***

Thank God Geralt didn’t forget to bring some oil. For a brief moment he interrupted the kiss and took out the little golden bottle from his pocket. The cook had given him a knowing smile when he gave her the coins in exchange for the bottle. But he didn't care what she thought of him. He didn't care what anybody was thinking of him. He had Jaskier! A very naked Jaskier who was lying in his bed. Jaskier, who wanted this as much as Geralt did. Everybody was allowed to know that he loved this man. This wasn't a secret! He would have liked to shout it from the rooftops but that would have been a little too blatant after all.

”Is this okay?“ he asked Jaskier for his confirmation, showing him the little bottle of oil. 

Even if he thought that Jaskier wanted this as much as Geralt, he had to hear his consent. Also, he wanted to give the bard a way out if he didn't want to go that far. 

“Oh yes…please…” Jaskier gasped, and fuck his begging did weird things to Geralt. 

This was all he needed to know. Hungry, he ran his tongue over one of Jaskier’s nipples, teasing the bud with his tongue and teeth until the other man moaned loudly.

“Fuck, Geralt. You’re killing me!”

Yes, this was exactly what he wanted. He wanted to wreck Jaskier, to make him fall apart and pull him back together. He wanted to ruin him for anybody else. 

Geralt nibbled on Jaskier’s earlobe and ground against his groin. Fuck, seeing the bard like this was so hot!

“Geralt if you don't stop I will come right now, I swear,” Jaskier moaned. “But I… I don’t want to come like this. I want you to open me with your fingers, and then I want to feel you inside of me. I want you to split me in half with that fat cock of yours… Fuuck, Geralt. Please!”

Geralt was panting loud and heavy now, his mouth was attacking Jaskier’s neck, wandering down to tease nipples again. 

“Please Geralt, I need you. I need you to fuck me so hard that I can feel you for days. I…” 

Oh, sweet mercy. Jaskier would be the death of him!

With a loud plop, Geralt released the abused nipple and reached up to kiss the beautiful bard on his lips as he slowly dripped oil onto his hand. Then he entered him with a single finger, moving slowly and cautiously because he didn’t want to hurt the other man. 

“Ahhh,” Jaskier moaned, closing his eyes. 

Geralt’s finger slipped in and out easily and after a short while he added another one. 

“More, please Geralt… I need more!” Jaskier begged and Geralt added a third finger.

The bard was panting very hard now. Fuck this was so hot!

Geralt didn’t think he could get any harder, but hearing Jaskier begging for him like this sent a rush of blood down to his groin, causing a growl to pour from his lips.

When Geralt’s three fingers slipped in and out without hindrance he withdrew them. Quickly he spread a huge amount of the oil on his cock. 

Jaskier made a sound of protest when Geralt’s fingers left him but the Witcher grabbed him by his thighs and slowly pushed in, not stopping until he was fully seated inside of the bard. 

The feeling was overwhelming. Jaskier was so tight. Geralt had to stop and take a deep breath. He didn’t want this to be over too soon. But he was so relieved that he was finally as close to the bard as two people could get. 

They were one! Finally! The feeling was indescribable and for the hundredth time in the last two days, he wondered why it took him so long to understand that this was all he ever wanted.

Jaskier moaned, eyes wide, breath hitching in his heaving chest. Geralt never thought that he would be able to feel so many things at once, love and adoration and like coming home and he was so turned on, he was about to explode!

No one ever had made him feel like this, like he was about to lose control. The memory of sex with Yennefer was downright ridiculous in comparison. How could he have been so blind for so long?

This was what he’d been waiting for, the view of Jaskier falling apart beneath him. 

“Move! I beg you, Geralt… move!” Jaskier pleaded and Geralt started to thrust into him. 

Oh by all the gods, Geralt knew that this would be over much too quickly. But they would have more than enough possibilities to do this again and again. Maybe even tonight.

“Don’t stop! Don’t you ever dare to stop…” the bard sobbed, squeezing Geralt’s ass tightly to encourage his thrusts even more.

It was more than obvious that Jaskier was close too.

When Jaskier’s back arched through his orgasm after only a few thrusts more, Geralt pinned him down and rocked into him harshly.

“Fuck,” Geralt whispered, helpless. “Look at you.”

Jaskier’s face was slack, there was a beautiful blush on his cheeks, his lips were kiss-swollen, and he made the most beautiful little sounds, but it was Jaskier’s words that sent Geralt over the edge in the end too.

“I’m yours… always was…Geralt, Geralt…I am yours,” the bard cried in euphoria.

Geralt came so hard he nearly saw stars. Sweet mother of mercy, this was the most intense orgasm in his life! 

***

It took awhile for them to calm down and catch their breaths. Geralt shifted his weight a little so he wouldn't crush Jaskier. 

The bard was playing with Geralt's hair until Geralt raised his head and looked at him.

”I am yours too, you know,” the Witcher said with an earnest tone of voice.

Jaskier didn't know what to say. He had given up hope for words like this a long time ago. If he was honest, then he never really expected for Geralt to return his feelings. He was always hoping, yes, but he wasn't expecting it. And yet, the other man was next to him and caressed Jaskier’s cheeks with his fingers. Tears were burning in the bard’s eyes.

“I love you,” he whispered, overwhelmed with feelings.

“And I love you. More than anything else!” Geralt replied and kissed him again.

***

"Why do we always have to wait for him? It can't take so long to saddle a horse and prepare it for departure," Yennefer complained when they wanted to leave the next day. 

"We're not in a hurry," Ciri replied with a smile. 

Jaskier chose not to say anything. He still didn't know if Yennefer was mad at him because he was now with Geralt. Although it was her fault as well that everything had come to this. After all, she was the one who broke up with Geralt back then on the mountain. Without this dramatic turn of events, everything would probably be different now. 

What a horrible thought!

Jaskier shuddered. He couldn't thank the gods enough for letting everything turn out like this. 

“What the hell?” Yennefer gasped.

Geralt approached them with a smile. With two horses! 

When did he...? Oh! That was the reason he had to leave the night before! 

Ciri grinned as if she already knew about it. Beaming with joy, she took the reins Geralt gave her. 

"This is for you, little one. Rosalie is your horse now. Yennefer can ride with you from now on," Geralt stated. 

Then he first put Scary on Roach and then helped Jaskier on the horse before he climbed the saddle himself as if buying a second horse was the most natural thing in the world. 

"From now on you will ride with me!" he whispered into Jaskeir's ear and fuck this shouldn't be hot. 

But hey! Jaskier was only human, or at least nearly human. The guy he'd been in love with for ages had gotten a horse especially because he wanted to be near him and he was now sitting tightly pressed against him in the saddle! 

Travelling would become so much more interesting from now on!

*** The End ***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was such a long ride! I wanted to write a little one-shot and started this in December. Now we have June and it got really long. I am a bit sad that it is over now. I had so much fun writing it and you were amazing!!!   
> And I can't tell you how thankful I am for thatwasamazing's help! This wouldn't be what it is without her!!!!


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